Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

FMLs submitted from Michigan

Today, I got a ticket from a cop for not riding my bike in the bike lane. I wasn't riding in the bike lane because I was avoiding construction work. FML

#17428177
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31957) - you deserved it (3543)

On 08/10/2011 at 10:44am - money - by donny31459 - United States (Michigan)

Today, my dad suggested that as an alternative to buying me new school clothes that actually fit, I should just join the swim team, lose some weight, and wear my stuff from last year. FML

#17398153
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21486) - you deserved it (12666)

On 08/07/2011 at 3:41pm - misc - by swmmr (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I went to pick up some of my clothes from my boyfriend's apartment. While searching under his bed he pulled out a tank top and bra and asked if they were mine. They weren't. FML

#17384017
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31106) - you deserved it (2730)

On 08/06/2011 at 1:41am - love - by ashlyn - United States (Michigan)

Today, I went mud wrestling for the first time at a mud bog. After a day of fun and getting cleaned up, I realized that my mom's ring was no longer on my finger. FML

#17366329
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10973) - you deserved it (47067)

On 08/04/2011 at 12:05pm - misc - by meganridner (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, my pet fish died because my drunk father microwaved it. FML

#17362826
191 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44039) - you deserved it (2965)

On 08/04/2011 at 1:44am - animals - by SydIsPrettyCool - United States (Michigan)

Today, I have to take medicine that gives me painful, violent farts. Tomorrow, I have to either get fired or go work in an office that's dead silent. How silent? Last week I heard my coworker drop a paperclip, three desks away. FML

#17305922
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36468) - you deserved it (3141)

On 07/30/2011 at 2:58am - work - by Tootie (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, my 8 year old son cut his own hair. He did a better job than I ever did. I'm a hairdresser. FML

#17279085
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16014) - you deserved it (30015)

On 07/27/2011 at 12:35pm - kids - by buiuuum - United States (Michigan)

Today, a drunk crashed a truck into my porch. Shaken up, I was glad to see that so many of my neighbors had gathered around to comfort me. When the dust settled, I noticed my remaining porch furniture was missing. They weren't consoling me, they were casing the place. FML

#17259270
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29236) - you deserved it (2588)

On 07/25/2011 at 9:32pm - misc - by ypsitucky (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, my girlfriend's overprotective parents decided that I'm a bad influence on their daughter. I'm a straight A engineering student who openly speaks out against drugs, alcohol, and discrimination. Their reason? Someone told them I dyed my hair black. They think I'm a "closet Nazi". FML

#17197650
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41392) - you deserved it (3672)

On 07/21/2011 at 12:10am - love - by rbeast (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, my house got robbed. They left a note: "Next time, we steal your souls." FML

#17156963
340 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37282) - you deserved it (3287)

On 07/18/2011 at 12:26am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Michigan)

Today, I ran to my car and zoomed to work to avoid being late. I was in such a hurry, I forgot to close all my windows. When I got back to my car, I found a dead squirrel inside. FML

#16937158
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22348) - you deserved it (8023)

On 07/01/2011 at 3:22pm - animals - by anon - United States (Michigan)

Today, I was sitting next to a lady on an airplane who was very overweight. She fell asleep on me, and violently bled from her nose upon take off and landing. FML

#16791372
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33955) - you deserved it (2676)

On 06/22/2011 at 12:03am - misc - by ifmlftw - United States (Michigan)

Today, I was working the register at our local McDonald's. After a strange man left a massive order, he said, "Can I pay you in gummy worms?" FML

#16690191
228 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33615) - you deserved it (3891)

On 06/16/2011 at 2:37am - work - by Hank Gummyworm - United States (Michigan)



Korrig'Anne's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Korrig'Anne's illustrated FML
  • So, have you ordered it? Have you got it? No? Yes? Do you have any idea of what I'm talking about? OK, for the normal people, I'm talking about the new iPhone 6. Apparently, it came out today. I'm not…

Friday 19 September 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: