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FMLs submitted from Michigan

Today, I was giving a PowerPoint presentation in class. When I put my flash drive into the computer, my folder opened up and a nude picture of myself popped right up on a 110 inch projector screen for all 35 students to see. This is a 16 week course. FML

#18044835
232 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14921) - you deserved it (58129)

On 10/22/2011 at 9:25am - misc - by jaymash - United States (Michigan)

Today, while cooking with my girlfriend, I thought it would be funny to slap her with a raw porkchop. She thought it would be funny to throw the hot cooking grease on me. FML

#18042854
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12590) - you deserved it (48554)

On 10/22/2011 at 12:07am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Michigan)

Today, I had to explain to my boyfriend why it would be highly offensive and inappropriate for him to go as Caylee Anthony for Halloween. I think he's still planning on doing it. FML

#18030465
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22501) - you deserved it (4352)

On 10/20/2011 at 10:32am - love - by Miroslav208 (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, while lying in bed with my boyfriend after some steamy lovemaking, he sat up, slapped my ass with excruciating force, and screamed, "I AM THE THUNDER!" directly into my ear. It seems our senses of humor differ considerably. FML

#17984134
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29197) - you deserved it (5981)

On 10/14/2011 at 7:03pm - intimacy - by myasshurts - United States (Michigan)

Today, my credit card got blocked. Apparently, my bank thinks buying a $130 flat iron online is suspicious. FML

#17836225
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23430) - you deserved it (5344)

On 09/26/2011 at 12:29am - money - by jpmetz - United States (Michigan)

Today, my ex girlfriend is sleeping over at my house. At some point while she was preparing to dump me, she became best friends with my sister. FML

#17764515
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27944) - you deserved it (2389)

On 09/17/2011 at 1:21pm - love - by Freechbear (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, my mom admitted that she always makes me put away the dishes because my obsessive compulsive tendencies force me to arrange the glasses and silverware by size, just the way she likes them. FML

#17747814
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22803) - you deserved it (4474)

On 09/14/2011 at 10:35pm - misc - by Awesome. (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I went to my favorite drive-in burger joint for dinner. As I was nearing the end of my burger, I grabbed a cup from the cup holder that I thought was filled with soda. Instead, I got a mouthful of dip spit that a friend left in my car. FML

#17697276
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28054) - you deserved it (7036)

On 09/08/2011 at 3:51pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, my wife showed me what was missing in our marriage with a Twilight video montage. FML

#17695562
209 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33862) - you deserved it (4189)

On 09/08/2011 at 8:52am - love - by I_dislike_Twilight (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I was put on notice at work due to my "anger problem." Apparently, sighing in a meeting means you will be labeled as someone with a short temper. However the creepy stalker guy is on the fast track to management. FML

#17694865
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21299) - you deserved it (2637)

On 09/08/2011 at 4:23am - work - by blue (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, it was my last day at my dad's. I thought he'd want to say goodbye, instead he told me, "Hope you've got all your shit. Anything you leave, I'm burning." FML

#17649393
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28491) - you deserved it (2300)

On 09/03/2011 at 12:33am - misc - by Panda_Bearr - United States (Michigan)

Today, I've gotten the most calls of my life. Turns out the idiot who changed the sign on my local pizza hut put up the wrong phone number. My phone number. I've already received 16 calls. FML

#17568217
172 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24304) - you deserved it (2211)

On 08/24/2011 at 1:14pm - misc - by Marty - United States (Michigan)

Today, this girl who has been stalking me for almost 7 months sent me a 12 page text comparing her love for me with her passion for cheese. FML

#17547922
218 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33637) - you deserved it (3241)

On 08/22/2011 at 1:19pm - love - by Say Cheese - United States (Michigan)



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