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FMLs submitted from Michigan

Today, I farted while asking a girl out to dinner. FML

#21306727
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22332) - you deserved it (4388)

On 11/27/2014 at 10:13am - love - by fart - United States (Michigan)

Today, what few friends I have won't talk to me anymore. My ex told them she dumped me because I abused her. I never abused her. What really happened is that she dumped me in a rage after I refused to give her money for drugs. Nobody's even asked for my side of the story. FML

#21306153
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28285) - you deserved it (1807)

On 11/26/2014 at 11:42am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I finally noticed how lonely I am when I realized I was petting my couch while reading a book. FML

#21305429
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22812) - you deserved it (2952)

On 11/24/2014 at 9:17pm - misc - by Hammy - United States (Michigan)

Today, after realizing my flashcards had fallen out of my binder, I asked my teacher if I could quickly go to my locker to get them. She said no and told me to go sit down. As soon as class ended, I went to my locker and brought them to her. Her response? "Why didn't you ask me to get these during class?" FML

#21301020
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33937) - you deserved it (2281)

On 11/17/2014 at 10:10pm - work - by ohgosh... (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, at work, a crazy customer forced me to promise to take a holiday greeting picture of my cat and myself for her. She says she'll be back and expects one. FML

#21300741
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27262) - you deserved it (2968)

On 11/17/2014 at 1:48pm - animals - by not crazy enough (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I was counselling a soon-to-be teen mom. She has a younger step-brother, and when I asked her how she handled him when he cries, she said, "Oh, that's when you cover their face until they stop!" FML

#21300330
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30110) - you deserved it (2056)

On 11/16/2014 at 9:25pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (Michigan)

Today, a friend wanted to show me a game he bragged he was the best at. I beat his score on the first try, and now I have a black eye to prove it. FML

#21299775
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27011) - you deserved it (2674)

On 11/15/2014 at 7:41pm - misc - by SeaBind - United States (Michigan)

Today, I once again used my phone to get out of a conversation with someone, instead of actually talking to someone on it. FML

#21298539
34 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22692) - you deserved it (6648)

On 11/13/2014 at 7:04pm - misc - by Jakeok (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, while in a hospital waiting room, a man started talking to me. After a few minutes, he asked me what I did for a living, and I said I'm a stay-at-home mom. He looked me up and down and said, "Huh. No life ambitions, huh?" FML

#21291978
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31278) - you deserved it (6543)

On 11/04/2014 at 2:08pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I walked into my house and saw it was flooded. I went upstairs to the bathroom to see the toilet overflowing and my boyfriend holding my dog over it so he could drink it. My boyfriend said he didn't know what else to do. FML

#21279204
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34456) - you deserved it (3449)

On 10/16/2014 at 4:53pm - misc - by anonymous - United States (Michigan)

Today, my wife yelled at me for being a bastard and not caring about her needs. I felt like an asshole and apologized for everything. It took me a few hours to realize I'd basically just apologized for unknowingly hanging the toilet paper the "wrong way" for her OCD. FML

#21279154
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33683) - you deserved it (4898)

On 10/16/2014 at 3:30pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, my father described me as "the sort of sucker women marry then cheat on all the time." My mother agreed with him. FML

#21279077
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33269) - you deserved it (2974)

On 10/16/2014 at 1:07pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Michigan)



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