Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

FMLs submitted from Massachusetts

Today, after what I thought was an amazing sex session with my boyfriend, he let out a big sigh and told me I need to watch more porn. FML

#20067539
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28297) - you deserved it (5862)

On 09/11/2012 at 12:54pm - intimacy - by apparently inexperienced (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I realized how much it sucks to have the same name as my dad when I overheard my mom moan his name in bed. FML

#20062873
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40005) - you deserved it (2174)

On 09/08/2012 at 7:38am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, while having sex with my girlfriend in the bathroom, we heard a knock at the door, then her father's voice. I had to fake constipation noises until he left. FML

#20053940
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22201) - you deserved it (12153)

On 09/02/2012 at 11:38am - intimacy - by scot - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my mom told me that she rather wait for the city bus all day, than allow me to give her a ride. FML

#20052248
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15904) - you deserved it (3102)

On 09/01/2012 at 9:58am - misc - by Chucho - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I discovered why the milk in my house has a funny, sweet taste. My family has been pouring the leftover milk from their cereal back into the carton. FML

#20045388
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26769) - you deserved it (1611)

On 08/27/2012 at 10:57pm - misc - by spekledworf - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I'm apparently so desperate for companionship that my body has subconsciously synced my period with the girl who works in the cubicle adjacent to mine. FML

#20044589
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16521) - you deserved it (2410)

On 08/27/2012 at 2:20pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I got a flat tire. The spare was also flat, so I had no other choice but to walk home. I got to my house and realized I'd left the front door key and garage clicker in my car 5 miles away. FML

#20044019
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19181) - you deserved it (8901)

On 08/27/2012 at 3:29am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my boyfriend and I were talking about being super heroes. He said I could be "The Period" because I'm a bitch. FML

#20040696
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18659) - you deserved it (8160)

On 08/25/2012 at 8:47am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, after a few weeks of smuggling a baby caterpillar into work every day just to make sure it ate and stayed alive long enough to turn into a butterfly, it finally did. Before it could fly free, a bird turned it into a snack. FML

#20033849
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23982) - you deserved it (5313)

On 08/21/2012 at 12:56pm - animals - by goodbyefriend - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my husband had a temper tantrum because I wouldn't get him a chocolate bar at the store register. FML

#20031596
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19324) - you deserved it (5213)

On 08/20/2012 at 8:12am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my boyfriend was coming home after a month of being away. When I heard him knock on the door, I rushed to open it and jumped into his arms for a hug. It wasn't him; it was the mailman. FML

Today, I found the perfect opportunity to throw my husband a surprise party since he thought I was away on a business trip. He came home with a hooker. Surprise! FML

#20016279
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46814) - you deserved it (3060)

On 08/12/2012 at 1:49am - intimacy - by happybirthday - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I had to explain to my friend that being arrested isn't something a decent person should have on their bucket list. I had to explain this while bailing her out of jail. FML

#20002792
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17503) - you deserved it (2052)

On 08/04/2012 at 8:27pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)



FML's blog

  • Cynthia's illustrated FML
  • TFIF indeed. It's time to kick off the suit and tie and forget about work. Some of us are going out for drinks with friends, others are going to enjoy some live music and some brave fools are going to keep fit…

Friday 28 November 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: