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FMLs submitted from Massachusetts

Today, I found out that I was held back in preschool because of some developmental issues. My parents didn't think it was important enough to mention it to me. Why hadn't I figured it out? They also lied to me about how old I was. FML

#4247689
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (72145) - you deserved it (4295)

On 08/03/2009 at 2:31am - misc - by dumb (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my boyfriend and I decided to be totally honest with each other. We even told some of our deepest, darkest secrets, in hopes of strengthening our relationship. He told me he had a diaper fetish, and would love to see me in one. There goes my sex life. FML

#4207325
255 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53044) - you deserved it (12450)

On 08/01/2009 at 2:17pm - intimacy - by Maria39018 (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I went for a run. I ended up being tackled by two cops, handcuffed, and dragged to the station with no explanation. Turns out a house nearby had been robbed and the best description they got was 'A man running'. I didn't even get an apology. FML

#4196733
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59891) - you deserved it (2601)

On 08/01/2009 at 12:30am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my boyfriend told me he was going out tonight to celebrate his ex-but-still-friends-girlfriend's birthday at a local club and hopes I wasn't offended that I wasn't invited. I sure am offended; we have the same birthday. FML

#4136342
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (79212) - you deserved it (3848)

On 07/29/2009 at 3:32pm - love - by imscrewed (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I had a job interview, but I arrived kind of late. I was in so much of a hurry that I hit a woman walking by in the face with the door. I offered to drive her to the hospital. Turns out that she was going to be interviewing me. She didn't offer to reschedule. FML

#4068517
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35074) - you deserved it (12721)

On 07/27/2009 at 12:07am - work - by OhNo. (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I was fired from the babysitting job I have had for 2 years. I thought maybe the mother had found out that I sometimes let her kids stay up late and have extra sweets. The real reason, as she told me, was that she didn't want her kids loving anyone more than they love her. FML

#3949898
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55001) - you deserved it (3261)

On 07/22/2009 at 8:17am - work - by babysitter93 (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I babysat the most annoying and obnoxious kids for almost eight hours, when the parents assured me that they would only be gone about three or so hours. After constant calling and worrying, they finally showed up at 11:30, completely drunk. The mother paid me with three dollars and a banana. FML

#3935872
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61398) - you deserved it (3511)

On 07/21/2009 at 6:17pm - kids - by GabsAlot829 (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I came home from living in Spain for 2 years. My mom made dinner for me, and she had forgotten about my allergy to citrus, because she made lemon chicken. After using my EpiPen, and calling 911 for myself, I heard my mom say to my dad, "She always did have to be the center of attention." FML

#3927246
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (62643) - you deserved it (3571)

On 07/21/2009 at 11:19am - health - by Lemonhead (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I was driving and saw two hot girls on the sidewalk so I rolled down the window to whistle at them. However, I failed to notice that the car in front of me had stopped at a red light. I rear ended the car, the girls ran away laughing their asses off, and now I have to pay for the damage. FML

#3919159
290 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8911) - you deserved it (110881)

On 07/21/2009 at 12:14am - love - by embarrassed (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I was going to volunteer at a soup kitchen. I saw a man working, so I went up to him to ask where I should sign in. Before I even opened my mouth, he told me that they opened at 12 and to come back then for my meal. FML

#3911129
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40335) - you deserved it (4507)

On 07/20/2009 at 6:44pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I went on a rollercoaster for the first time. I sat in the back, which was a bad idea. When it ended everyone in front of me turned around and stared. When I asked my friend what was going on, she said I had been screaming the Lord's Prayer the whole time. I hadn't even noticed. FML

#3908348
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37177) - you deserved it (25460)

On 07/20/2009 at 4:05pm - misc - by whyme_ss - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I was talking to the girl I've liked for 2 years. We were assigned partners for a History project so we were going to work on it at my house. When she asked me for directions, I told her I lived on Woodcock Road. She yelled slapped me and stormed off. I was serious. FML

#3894865
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54465) - you deserved it (3167)

On 07/20/2009 at 12:04am - love - by thicklysettled (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I went into a restaurant and sat at a bar near three guys who appeared to be 19 or 20. They did not acknowledge me. 15 minutes later, my burger arrived. They all ran over to ask me about it. I haven't been hit on in months. My cheeseburger is more attractive to men than I am. FML

#3886225
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43972) - you deserved it (6479)

On 07/19/2009 at 6:02pm - love - by Tasty (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)



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