Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

FMLs submitted from Massachusetts

Today, I was in one of two hot tubs with my dad at a vacation resort, when 3 good looking guys walked into the pool area. My dad moved to the other hot tub so the guys could hang out in the one I was in. They came outside, passed my hot tub, and went into the one my dad just moved into. FML

#7426309
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28558) - you deserved it (4091)

On 01/18/2010 at 9:06pm - love - by pictureperfect678 (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I woke up in my boyfriend's dorm and decided to take a shower before he woke up. I used the girls bathroom on the above floor, and afterwards just threw on a towel and ran to the elevator. I forgot to press my boyfriend's floor and I was taken to the lobby in a towel. People were waiting. FML

#7344260
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6872) - you deserved it (29260)

On 01/14/2010 at 7:43pm - misc - by nude (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I snuck out of work 2 hours early. As I was speeding away so I wouldn't be seen, I rear-ended my boss as he was leaving the lower parking lot for a late lunch. FML

#7336289
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5787) - you deserved it (42615)

On 01/14/2010 at 10:14am - work - by Ilovelife07 (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I woke up at 3am because my wife was snoring loudly enough to wake me up. I went off to the guest room to try to get back to sleep. Eventually I fell back asleep. Then I had a dream that my wife was snoring loudly enough to wake me up. It woke me up. FML

#7286498
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26659) - you deserved it (2648)

On 01/11/2010 at 8:40pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, the little boy I nanny for finally stood up and went 'pee-pee on the potty'. I started cheering and clapping, making a big deal out of it. I flushed while he smiled proudly and pooped on the floor. FML

#7278236
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25789) - you deserved it (3102)

On 01/11/2010 at 1:08pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I realized why my bathroom has been smelling so bad. My 10-year-old son has been peeing on the radiator, thinking it's fun to watch it steam and sizzle. FML

#7257345
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33021) - you deserved it (2924)

On 01/10/2010 at 12:17pm - kids - by Amber (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my boyfriend and I were getting it on in his room. In a sexy voice, I asked him, "What are you thinking right now?" He replied, "I'm thinkin' Arby's." FML

#7225857
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18378) - you deserved it (5109)

On 01/08/2010 at 10:30pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I did my workout at the gym instead of at home as I usually do, since I'm paranoid about people seeing up my shorts. I told myself to get over it, because it's impossible. After my extensive workout, I realized that there was a hole in the crotch of my shorts. FML

#7199308
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23715) - you deserved it (9494)

On 01/07/2010 at 1:56pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, while using the bathroom on an airplane, someone walked in on me wiping my butt. That person just so happened to be the stranger I was sitting next to. It was an 8 hour flight. FML

#7145421
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28778) - you deserved it (7506)

On 01/04/2010 at 12:40pm - misc - by GeorgiaBOYY (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I put cucumber slices on my eyes to help me relax. I found this very calming till I woke up to ants trying to eat my eyes out. FML

#7130565
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27036) - you deserved it (6003)

On 01/03/2010 at 6:59pm - misc - by jumpy (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I handed my friend a $50. I paid her to take care of my farm on Farmville, feed my fish on Fishville, and flip my burgers on Cafe World, while I went on vacation for a week. FML

#7122357
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10222) - you deserved it (63500)

On 01/03/2010 at 7:00am - misc - by loser (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, the 6 year old girl I was babysitting asked me, "Why are you so ugly? Are you an alien? Because aliens are about as ugly as you are." FML

#7079923
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35020) - you deserved it (3620)

On 01/01/2010 at 10:41am - kids - by silverstar189 (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, Facebook told me I should reconnect with my husband. FML

#6967359
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29924) - you deserved it (7267)

On 12/27/2009 at 1:30am - love - by reconnect (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)



FML's blog

  • Angie's illustrated FML
  • Here we go again. This week I'm talking to you live from the Paris Japan Expo. I'm dressed up as Bernard from the Sailor Moon series, and I almost got kicked out because my katana wasn't the…

Friday 3 July 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: