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FMLs submitted from Massachusetts

Today, I got into my boyfriends car having to pee really badly. I accidentally peed everywhere. He kicked me out. I had to walk four miles home in 20 degree weather. In wet clothes. FML

#8592124
337 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12932) - you deserved it (39734)

On 02/23/2010 at 5:10pm - misc - by whyme_ss - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, while playing Star Wars: The Force Unleashed, my phone rang, and I instinctively tried to pick it up with the Force. I kept trying until it stopped ringing. FML

#8480132
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6350) - you deserved it (40823)

On 02/20/2010 at 2:04pm - misc - by analinguist (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I was in pain due to overdoing it at the gym yesterday, so I thought a hot shower might help. Not only was there no hot water because of my sister's hour long showers, but I slipped getting out and hit my head. Now the pain is worse. FML

#8473008
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20110) - you deserved it (2698)

On 02/20/2010 at 9:03am - health - by bcoper - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my friends told me, "Don't worry about your bad acne. It kind of looks like the pattern the avatars have on their heads." FML

#8445794
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25083) - you deserved it (2376)

On 02/19/2010 at 3:27pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my grandma called me to tell me that a couple of cute boys stopped by her house to borrow something. She told them all about me, and that I would be interested in them. My love life is so pathetic, even my grandmother is trying to hook me up. FML

#8394792
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22353) - you deserved it (4128)

On 02/18/2010 at 12:07am - love - by loveless - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I received a letter in the mail. The letter was from a woman who explained to me every single detail of a three month affair she had with my husband. She included pictures. FML

#8375292
185 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38378) - you deserved it (2125)

On 02/17/2010 at 2:49pm - love - by tj85 (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, while at a family get together, my bowels suddenly decided they needed to be emptied. Straight away. I felt bad enough using someone else's bathroom for this, but later, my sister came in and loudly said "God, Brian, what the hell have you been eating?" in front of everyone at the get together. FML

#8285725
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20466) - you deserved it (2852)

On 02/15/2010 at 2:08am - misc - by MisterBrown (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, while out for our romantic Valentine's dinner, my boyfriend of 2 and a half years told me that he believes in females being subservient, that I'm not allowed to have opinions anymore, that he is "the alpha dog" and I'm merely the "beta dog", and that I have to "get used to it." FML

#8263178
289 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31575) - you deserved it (6868)

On 02/14/2010 at 7:43pm - love - by Shirley (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, while working security at the mall, someone shat his pants. The shit dripped all over the floor and escalator. I was the one who had to stand near the poop so no one stepped in it. FML

#8230374
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23342) - you deserved it (2178)

On 02/14/2010 at 12:07am - work - by mallcop - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I was babysitting. The kid said he had to use the bathroom. When I told him to go ahead, he said he just did. He was on my lap. He wasn't wearing pants. FML

#8125309
185 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23159) - you deserved it (7236)

On 02/11/2010 at 8:33am - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my dad got a hard-on looking at my best friend. He asked me how my NutriSystem diet was going. He was looking at my friend's boobs when he asked me. FML

#8082949
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19392) - you deserved it (1993)

On 02/10/2010 at 7:23am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, while on my way to the break room, it seemed as if everyone was staring at me and giving me odd looks. I asked my friend, "Did I get prettier overnight or something?" She answered, "No, your shirt is just see-through." FML

#8011432
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8932) - you deserved it (26225)

On 02/08/2010 at 1:24pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my mother gave my daughter a behavior chart. I noticed that "drinking beer" was at the top of one of the columns. It's a chart for my daughter to use on me so my mother can judge my parenting skills. I am currently losing a sticker right now for being on the computer. FML

#7775302
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29940) - you deserved it (4481)

On 02/01/2010 at 8:17am - kids - by argh (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)



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