Today, I saw a spider crawling on my new roommate's cheek, so I told her to stand still so that I could flick it off. Several long seconds of flicking made me realize that it wasn't a spider at all. I had been flicking her hairy mole. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11051) - you deserved it (21836)
On 10/05/2010 at 5:01pm - animals - by jabba (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, I changed all my plans, after months of him begging me to, so I could go to the same university as my long-term boyfriend. After I sent in my deposit, he told me we couldn't live together in college because I was "invading his space." FML
I agree, your life sucks (16828) - you deserved it (9481)
On 09/30/2010 at 1:31am - love - by stupidgirl (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, I met my fiancée's parents for the first time. Her dad was telling me how he's not rich but not poor either. I replied, "Well, as long as you're not a garbage man!" Guess what his profession is. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8243) - you deserved it (25810)
On 09/10/2010 at 8:39pm - misc - by charlie043 (man) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, my father told me to stop purposely singing out of tune because it was annoying. I wasn't doing it on purpose; it's my real voice. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17052) - you deserved it (4452)
On 09/05/2010 at 5:51pm - misc - by noonotme (man) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, I found out that my entire school differentiates me from another girl in my grade with the same name by saying "No, she's the lesbian one." I'm straight. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20385) - you deserved it (2258)
On 08/28/2010 at 7:40pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, I was working as a camp counselor helping a five year old girl. I heard her mumble, "My grandpa is getting married on Saturday." I enthusiastically replied and told her how exciting that was! Only after did I realize that she said 'buried'. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20258) - you deserved it (6227)
On 08/25/2010 at 12:32pm - misc - by counselor - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, I kissed my girlfriend. She threw up in my mouth. FML
I agree, your life sucks (43924) - you deserved it (5528)
On 08/16/2010 at 4:20pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, I found out that my overprotective parents hired a private investigator a month ago, who since then has been watching my perfectly normal boyfriend, in case he "tries to rape or kill" me. We're both 25 years old. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31049) - you deserved it (1802)
On 08/15/2010 at 8:52am - love - by wtf - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, I missed my shift at work. I had asked my girlfriend, who works at the same store, to text me my schedule. She sent me the wrong hours for today. I got suspended, and she broke up with me for being too irresponsible. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25449) - you deserved it (7382)
On 08/14/2010 at 4:41pm - love - by irresponsible (man) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, I was on the way to traffic court for a $340 speeding ticket I'd got. My mother called me and I wasn't paying attention which caused me to speed. Right past a cop. When I told the cop where I was going, he started laughing at me. I now have another $300 ticket. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7226) - you deserved it (39957)
On 08/13/2010 at 10:16am - money - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, I realized that in French, my name means "penis." This wouldn't be so bad if my dad wasn't fluent in French. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34446) - you deserved it (2994)
On 08/05/2010 at 2:24pm - love - by kiki - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, I went surfing. One of my instructors came up to me and told me that the other, good looking, instructor didn't have a girlfriend. Who then turned around and said "I do if you are trying to set me up with her." FML
I agree, your life sucks (29379) - you deserved it (2728)
On 07/27/2010 at 9:56am - love - by nu_ravers_101 (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, I learned that my mom's laptop was originally my Christmas gift. She opened it and decided she liked it so much she should have it. I got hot rollers. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27216) - you deserved it (1658)
On 07/16/2010 at 7:43pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)
Monday 17 June 2013
The website: FML t-shirts -
Love - Animals - Money - Kids - Work - Health - Intimacy - Miscellaneous - Members
RSS feeds: 
Follow the FML 
Follow the FML blog Follow the FML comments
Go on the road: BlackBerry - Android - iPhone/iPod Touch - Windows Phone 7 - Mobile version
Give stuff to people: FML book - FML t-shirts
FML Everywhere: Français - Italiano - Español - Türk - Pусский - Svenskt - Indonesia
