Today, a woman cursed me out, called me a perverted freak, and said I should be ashamed of myself because I had asked her "How much for one night?." She works in a toy shop, I was with my five year old daughter, and was pointing to the sign, "Rent A Helium Tank!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (19865) - you totally deserved it (985)
On 11/18/2009 at 2:52pm - kids - by whatthewhat - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, I was waiting at an intersection. Across from me, a car was approaching and a bunny ran out. Trying to save it, I flashed my lights and beeped at the car crazily, when the bunny turned around. The lights turned, and as I drove forward the bunny came back out and I hit it. FML
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On 11/17/2009 at 8:08pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, I found a gift card under my bed that I lost a few months ago for $400 to a store that went out of business last week. FML
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On 11/17/2009 at 4:19pm - money - by fmfl (man) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, I got a call from my ex asking if I could fix her computer. I brought my 7 year old son with me. On the way I told him, how I hated her, but I can't be rude. Once we get there, I say to her "it's nice to see you." My son says "but I thought you said you want her to fall off a bridge?" FML
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On 11/08/2009 at 8:08pm - kids - by Dan (man) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, it was my husband's and my anniversary. He was at work, so I decided to dress up "sexy". You know, the typical lacey thong and fishnets. I heard the door open, and what I thought was him was actually my brother who'd visited to wish me a happy anniversary. FML
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On 11/07/2009 at 5:22pm - intimacy - by sexysue (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, my boyfriend of 3 months and I finally had it off. He sounds like Chewbacca when he comes. FML
I agree, your life sucks (4851) - you totally deserved it (975)
On 11/02/2009 at 9:17pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, it was my 17th birthday. I didn't want my family to spend money on a cake, so my dad made this delicious apple ring. At least, it was great until my mouth began to itch and my throat closed. I have been allergic to nuts since birth, and my dad put walnuts in my birthday cake. FML
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On 11/02/2009 at 1:12am - health - by UnluckyJulie (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, at my school's Midnight Madness, I was selected to show my school spirit in a contest. Being drunk, I decided to hump the school mascot in front of 300 people. FML
I agree, your life sucks (2953) - you totally deserved it (26884)
On 10/30/2009 at 1:11am - misc - by skyhawk13 - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, it was my wedding day. I gave a speech about the first time my wife and I met. I said I knew she was the perfect woman for me and it was love at first sight. I looked to my right as she stormed off and then realized I had told a story about my ex-girlfriend who was sitting in the crowd. FML
I agree, your life sucks (4530) - you totally deserved it (44964)
On 10/28/2009 at 5:22pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, my girlfriend's best friend was dumped, and was absolutely depressed. My girlfriend thought she'd show her sympathy by breaking up with me so they "could be single together." FML
I agree, your life sucks (29318) - you totally deserved it (1015)
On 10/27/2009 at 7:13pm - love - by dumped (man) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, while filling out some medical forms, I was asked for an emergency contact. I realized I didn't have anyone who would actually care enough to be my contact. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21183) - you totally deserved it (1583)
On 10/26/2009 at 5:43pm - misc - by meagainsttheworld (man) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, my sister got married. For the second time. She's 30. Two men have loved her enough to cry over their vows to her. Every single person there asked me why I wasn't married yet. FML
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On 10/25/2009 at 10:27pm - love - by joyful-not (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, I left my room to take a quick shower. When I came back, I found out that my roommate had locked the door. She also left for the entire weekend. I had to wait in a towel for someone to get the RA to unlock my door for twenty minutes as the whole floor laughed their asses off. FML
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On 10/24/2009 at 4:07pm - misc - by warren16C (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)
