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FMLs submitted from Maryland

Today, I went to school in my brand new shirt. It was loose fitting and a bit thin, so I wore a sweatshirt on top, intending to take it in once inside. When I got to my seat, I took off my sweatshirt, but also took off my shirt with it, flashing my whole class. FML

#13889988
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30031) - you deserved it (11349)

On 11/18/2010 at 6:12pm - misc - by Amanda Ross - United States (Maryland)

Today, I was at work, when I got bored and started spinning around in my chair for a little fun. As I was spinning, I went to grab my phone. I missed and sent my phone flying, hitting my coworker in the face. My boss witnessed the whole thing. FML

#13577689
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8420) - you deserved it (35937)

On 10/24/2010 at 3:29pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Maryland)

Today, after a heated debate with my friend on whether blondes are naturally stupid, I convinced her that I'm actually quite intelligent, and poured myself a glass of juice in victory. After finishing the glass, instead of returning the bottle back to the refrigerator, I put it in the cupboard. FML

#13551763
194 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8971) - you deserved it (39353)

On 10/22/2010 at 4:37pm - misc - by Blondie (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I was walking down my very steep basement stairs when I fell and rolled all the way down but luckily I didn't hurt anything. While walking back up around the very last stair, my cat jumped out on me, causing me to roll all the way back down. FML

#13536174
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28580) - you deserved it (3837)

On 10/21/2010 at 10:48am - health - by catattack78 (man) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I finally worked up the courage to play my friends the demo CD that I've spent all summer recording. I didn't tell them it was me. Not even 10 seconds into the first song, my best friend asked me to turn it off because it sucked. FML

#12826114
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28699) - you deserved it (6371)

On 08/30/2010 at 7:25pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, at work, I stopped in my boss/boyfriend's office to find him getting intimate with a girl. He then tells me that he is cheating on me, that he is dumping me, and that I am fired. Oh, and he is keeping the cat. FML

#12677000
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41042) - you deserved it (6345)

On 08/22/2010 at 2:28am - work - by jemstuff (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, all the while my friends were over, my mom took too many of her pills and walked around the house nude. She then bit me. FML

#12624086
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41084) - you deserved it (3494)

On 08/19/2010 at 11:48am - misc - by feartheend511 - United States (Maryland)

Today, I discovered that my name literally means "burden". This wouldn't be so bad if both my mother and father knew this when they named me. FML

#12596251
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28459) - you deserved it (2902)

On 08/18/2010 at 12:30am - misc - by Anon (man) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I went to an elementary school for volunteer work. I was asked to read to a group of kids during one of the classes. Before I started reading, a girl raised her hand and asked me if I had a boyfriend and if I was single. I asked her why and she said "My daddy wanted to know." I'm 16. FML

#12307637
183 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36292) - you deserved it (3829)

On 08/04/2010 at 10:40am - misc - by LaRae17 (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, my boyfriend decided he would do his job while I did my "job" on top of him. He whips out his Blackberry and completely ignores me to send e-mails to co-workers reminding them about the 10 a.m. meeting scheduled for the next morning. FML

#12097143
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29200) - you deserved it (5422)

On 07/25/2010 at 1:57am - intimacy - by blackberrybummer (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I went to my boyfriend's house. Expecting to get a little action, I was surprised to find that he had fallen asleep while I was showering. I spent my night watching television and browsing the internet while he snored. Loudly. FML

#11998516
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28550) - you deserved it (9694)

On 07/20/2010 at 4:15am - intimacy - by Ugh... - United States (Maryland)

Today, is the first weekend I have off this summer. Instead of letting me see my friends, my dad printed out a practice SAT exam. I've already taken the SAT. He just "doesn't want me to get rusty". FML

#11312975
185 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35009) - you deserved it (3457)

On 06/19/2010 at 2:53pm - misc - by Classicmen - United States (Maryland)

Today, the supervisory staff at work was changed in my area. The good news? My boyfriend is now my manager. The bad news? My ex, the guy I cheated on my boyfriend with, is our supervisor. FML



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