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FMLs submitted from Manitoba

Today, I won $200 a contest at a bar. The manager took me to a vault where money collected from the strippers go into a pool. He told me that at least half of the bills were slid through a strippers butt crack so I was to "choose wisely". FML

#2427031
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36074) - you deserved it (6513)

On 05/30/2009 at 7:39am - money - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Manitoba)

Today, I was getting ready for my first date with a boy I really like when my dad insisted on meeting him. My dad is super protective and a cop. He cleaned his gun in front of my date and made it clear he had to be careful with me. My date started to cry when we got to the car. FML

#2376689
375 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57401) - you deserved it (4408)

On 05/28/2009 at 4:15pm - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (Manitoba)

Today, my grandpa took out the family for dinner and paid for everyone. He paid the bill and my family and I were waiting by the door. I realised I probably should thank him for dinner. I turn around without thinking and give him a big hug and say thanks for dinner Grandpa. It wasn't my grandpa. FML

#2170558
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9788) - you deserved it (30685)

On 05/22/2009 at 1:12am - misc - by dummy (man) - Canada (Manitoba)

Today, I poured myself some punch into a mug I have sitting on a shelf at my studio. Upon tipping it upside down to swallow the last few delicious drops, I see a cluster of mouse droppings stuck to the bottom. FML

#1808336
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40334) - you deserved it (14480)

On 05/10/2009 at 10:10am - health - by kimos (man) - Canada (Manitoba)

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, the phone rang so I went to answer it. No one was there. A minute later the phone rang again and no one answered so I assumed it was a telemarketer or a prank so I started swearing uncontrollably in rage. Turns out it was my crush calling to ask me out, but she was too nervous to ask. FML

#880527
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14129) - you deserved it (53544)

On 04/09/2009 at 1:04am - love - by skmusic (man) - Canada (Manitoba)

Today, my mom had my girlfriend and I over. Out of the blue, she pulled out my grandmother's wedding ring and gave it to me saying I can now propose. My girlfriend started screaming and said yes. I have been seeing someone else for 3 months and was going to break up with my girlfriend tomorrow. FML

#172507
437 comments

I agree, your life sucks (85665) - you deserved it (191576)

On 03/01/2009 at 4:58pm - love - by MrCanoe (man) - Canada (Manitoba)

Today, I was going to confess to my best friend that I am madly in love with her. I called her up only to find her crying. She was upset that she might be pregnant with some guy. FML

#389
32 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25193) - you deserved it (1488)

On 11/25/2008 at 1:05pm - love - by Noname - Canada (Manitoba)



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