Today, my brother thought it would be hilarious to take a pair of scissors to all my bras. My mom can't take me shopping for another three days and I have no one to borrow a bra from. I have school. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32169) - you deserved it (3012)
On 05/01/2011 at 12:11pm - money - by Anonymous - United States (Louisiana)
Today, I walked into the laundry room when my mom pulled a condom wrapper out of my pants pocket. She looked at me and said "you know you can't wash and reuse these." FML
I agree, your life sucks (21122) - you deserved it (16021)
On 04/19/2011 at 12:19pm - misc - by killercow - United States (Louisiana)
Today, I finally started my job as an in-home caregiver. The man I was hired to care for died two hours after I made it to his house. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35665) - you deserved it (2647)
On 04/18/2011 at 3:24pm - work - by nurseITHINKNOT - United States (Louisiana)
Today, I found out that to save on expenses, my wife booked a very small hotel room for ourselves and the kids while we visit Disney World. I've been officially cockblocked by Mickey Mouse. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26968) - you deserved it (5940)
On 02/18/2011 at 5:29pm - intimacy - by Disney - United States (Louisiana)
Today, I printed out a picture of the popular girl in school as a sort of 'model' for how I wanted my hair cut. The hairdresser taped the picture to the mirror so he could see. Halfway through, my 'model' came in for an appointment. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22526) - you deserved it (15234)
On 02/15/2011 at 8:34pm - misc - by nerdychick (woman) - United States (Louisiana)
Today, after informing my boss I needed stress leave from my 70 hour a week shifts, I got my new work assignment. Sixty hours a week starting at 2am. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18844) - you deserved it (2740)
On 02/11/2011 at 11:02pm - work - by NotAMorningPerson - United States (Louisiana)
Today, as I'm pregnant, my mom came over to do some nice things for me, such as clean my kitchen and cook a large pot of my favorite soup. When she left, I took a nap, planning to eat later. I woke up to find my roommates had trashed my kitchen and eaten all my soup. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24066) - you deserved it (3434)
On 01/11/2011 at 4:43am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Louisiana)
Today, I was at my boyfriends house, in the bathroom. I noticed a pregnancy test in the trash can. He lives alone. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29714) - you deserved it (1993)
On 01/09/2011 at 9:35pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Louisiana)
Today, while lying in bed with my fiancé, we were talking about how we'd rather die, if given a choice. I said, "I want to die in my sleep next to you." His response? "It'd be sexier if you were on top of me with your face between my legs." Cute, honey. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19438) - you deserved it (4711)
On 12/31/2010 at 2:21pm - intimacy - by legwarmer (woman) - United States (Louisiana)
Today, I took my daughter to the grocery store. The bag boy seemed to be flirting with me and smiling. He had to be half my age. Once in the car I glimpsed myself in the rear view mirror. I had chocolate completely covering one of my front teeth. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12900) - you deserved it (5190)
On 12/31/2010 at 1:13am - misc - by brenami (woman) - United States (Louisiana)
Today, I came to the realization I make a living trimming the hair off dogs' privates. I've touched more dog penises than I have human ones, and sometimes the dogs get "excited" while I'm working. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25067) - you deserved it (5202)
On 12/15/2010 at 12:07pm - intimacy - by penisgrabber - United States (Louisiana)
Today, while I was working at McDonald's, a man and his wife ordered a Sundae. I gave the guy his sundae and realized I'd forgotten something. I said, "One second sir. Let me grab your nuts." I realized what I said when his wife gave me the death glare. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25344) - you deserved it (7144)
On 12/11/2010 at 7:06pm - work - by stifledbyyou (woman) - United States (Louisiana)
Today, two guys broke into my apartment to rob me at gunpoint. While I was wanking. FML
I agree, your life sucks (51128) - you deserved it (9745)
On 12/01/2010 at 12:11am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Louisiana)
Monday 20 May 2013
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