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FMLs submitted from Louisiana

Today, I puked up an anti-nausea pill. FML

#21026645
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49688) - you deserved it (4492)

On 01/13/2014 at 3:35pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Louisiana)

Today, I realized just how lonely I am when I tried to time my ejaculation to happen right as the new year started. FML

#21012409
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47931) - you deserved it (11247)

On 01/01/2014 at 1:41am - intimacy - by Lonesome (man) - United States (Louisiana)

Today, my fiancée of 2 years and mother of my son, who is also pregnant with our second son, commented on how lucky two friends getting married were to have found each other. I said that we're just as lucky. She responded, "No. They actually love each other." FML

#20936067
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45434) - you deserved it (4126)

On 10/27/2013 at 8:41pm - love - by failure (man) - United States (Louisiana)

Today, I was in a public bathroom with the runs when I noticed my stall didn't have any toilet paper. I was the only one in the bathroom, and I thought I could make it to the stall next to me and grab some with my pants down. I wasn't actually the only one in there. FML

#20901686
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38957) - you deserved it (8214)

On 09/30/2013 at 6:30am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Louisiana)

Today, I showed up at my brother's house for a visit. Little did I know, there was a family gathering. My bestfriend was invited and I wasn't. She's "more fun and less awkward" than I am. FML

#20864835
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36968) - you deserved it (3044)

On 09/02/2013 at 5:23pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Louisiana)

Today, my girlfriend and I started fighting. Instead of arguing for herself, she decided to set her puppy on me. Only "Puppy" is the name of her fully-grown police-trained German Shepherd. FML

#20847973
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50518) - you deserved it (6798)

On 08/21/2013 at 2:58pm - animals - by mykhael (man) - United States (Louisiana)

Today, when I got back to my dorm, I found a trail of ants trying to shove a dead roach into a power outlet. The front desk insists that there is no pest problem. FML

#20846099
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41649) - you deserved it (2365)

On 08/20/2013 at 8:54am - animals - by TheRoad42 - United States (Louisiana)

Today, I went to my car to get a few things, when I discovered it had been broken into. Nothing of value was taken. My window was busted in just for a pack of cigarettes, a lighter, and my car ash tray. FML

#20833889
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41104) - you deserved it (6547)

On 08/12/2013 at 2:54pm - misc - by amayasoma - United States (Louisiana)

Today, I came home from work to my hot roommate cooking and wearing nothing but an apron. She pulled me into her room and things went great. At least, they did before I woke up in the break room with my coworkers and boss all gathered around, listening to me talking in my sleep. FML

#20793742
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52709) - you deserved it (8985)

On 07/20/2013 at 4:35am - work - by Dirty_Mind_69 (man) - United States (Louisiana)

Today, I got lost, and eventually noticed that I'd passed by the same house a few times. Apparently somebody who lives on that street noticed as well, because the next time I passed by, the police were waiting for me. FML

#20776976
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44047) - you deserved it (3922)

On 07/12/2013 at 12:36am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Louisiana)

Today, I found the purse that some asshat stole from my 15-year-old sister a few days ago. I found it in my now ex-boyfriend's closet. When I confronted him, he broke up with me for "invading" his privacy and kicked me out, without the purse. FML

#20754769
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44052) - you deserved it (3587)

On 06/29/2013 at 6:52pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Louisiana)

Today, on my first day at my new job delivering pizzas, I got bit by a guy dressed as Dracula. FML

#20750993
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41141) - you deserved it (2962)

On 06/27/2013 at 7:15pm - work - by keiran123 - United States (Louisiana)

Today, my sister sent me countless pictures of my boyfriend making out with different girls at a bar. His excuse? Photoshop. FML

#20726929
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49621) - you deserved it (3977)

On 06/15/2013 at 3:32am - love - by Anonymous - United States (Louisiana)



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