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FMLs submitted from Louisiana

Today, I visited my boyfriend's uncle's house for a party. His 8 year old cousin started asking if I like penis, so my reaction was to laugh, spitting my drink on her and her new dress. She can't pronounce peanuts, and I can't visit anymore. FML

#21510516
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20431) - you deserved it (3462)

On 01/02/2016 at 3:25am - kids - by me - United States (Louisiana)

Today, my dad read that if you pass gas from both ends at the same time it will create a vacuum inside your body and you'll implode. I can't convince him otherwise. FML

#21501049
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19936) - you deserved it (1573)

On 12/07/2015 at 8:28am - misc - by anonymous - United States (Louisiana)

Today, my mom hates my grandmother (her mother-in-law) so much that she's trying to guilt me into not visiting her when I come home for Thanksgiving. I wouldn't be coming home for Thanksgiving in the first place, but my grandmother bought me the plane ticket. FML

#21496518
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21905) - you deserved it (1320)

On 11/25/2015 at 12:23am - misc - by dickbag - United States (Louisiana)

Today, I finally told my boyfriend I have a medical condition that makes me grow an unusual amount of hair on my face, so I shave every day. He said he was leaving me because he refuses to be with a "bearded lady". FML

#21490845
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27127) - you deserved it (2217)

On 11/10/2015 at 2:27pm - love - by Foxy0706 - United States (Louisiana)

Today, my financial situation is so dire that I tried to steal toilet paper from work. I got caught. FML

#21481830
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24567) - you deserved it (5432)

On 10/19/2015 at 2:04pm - work - by PoorGal (woman) - United States (Louisiana)

Today, I was supposed to start my new job. I had forgotten I had a doctor's appointment, so I called work early and told them I wouldn't be able to start until tomorrow. My boss then terminated my employment. I got fired before I even started. FML

#21474765
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12624) - you deserved it (28605)

On 09/30/2015 at 9:42pm - work - by No Job - United States (Louisiana)

Today, I finished a 6-part project. It took me 7 hours of straight work because my partner decided I should do it alone. I then learned that the reason my partner did not help me was because the teacher e-mailed the leader of every group, saying the project was cancelled. FML

#21470825
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24931) - you deserved it (2249)

On 09/20/2015 at 11:26pm - misc - by I'm donnnneeee - United States (Louisiana)

Today, my fiancé heard I was having a rotten day at work. He stopped by the flower shop and bought me a lovely rose which I put right next to my work station. That is until a giant wasp flew out and stung me. I still have a swollen arm hours later. FML

#21433819
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26646) - you deserved it (2101)

On 06/29/2015 at 1:30pm - love - by rinakitty94 - United States (Louisiana)

Today, my dad got so drunk that I had to drive him home. He kept yelling at me to not speed, saying I was going too fast and that there were too many bumps on the road. I hadn't even started the car yet. FML

Today, I had my performance review at work. Under the "oral communication" category my boss wrote that I "act like an asshole." FML

#21354453
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27041) - you deserved it (5687)

On 02/11/2015 at 10:59pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (Louisiana)

Today, I spent a half hour trying to help my cat down after he got stuck in the tree on my lawn. I finally gave up and called a local tree care company to help. When I returned outside, I found my cat casually walking about by the door. The guy who showed up to help was not happy. FML

#21341011
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27407) - you deserved it (5253)

On 01/20/2015 at 3:24pm - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Louisiana)

Today, I confronted my wife because I thought the many hours a day she spends at a local coffee shop were so she could smoke. Turns out she's cheating on me. FML

#21337071
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36197) - you deserved it (2928)

On 01/14/2015 at 4:48pm - love - by SouthPaw (man) - United States (Louisiana)

Today, the lady whose son I babysit sent me a text, saying she left a gift for me for all the hard work I've done. I found a beautifully-wrapped box where she said the gift was. It turned out my actual gift was cookies sitting right next to it. FML



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