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FMLs submitted from London

Today, I found out I have a job interview coming up. For the job I'm currently doing and have been for the last nine months. My manager told me not to expect too much. FML

#13152875
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19573) - you deserved it (2019)

On 09/22/2010 at 2:56am - work - by innuendom - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I found out that my mother has been seeing my maths teacher. I'm still failing his class. FML

#13144525
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25726) - you deserved it (6799)

On 09/21/2010 at 5:28pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I walked in on my dad touching his knob, in the kitchen, while cooking. FML

#13127028
204 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33559) - you deserved it (3523)

On 09/20/2010 at 10:58am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I was walking down the stairs holding a glass of water, when I tripped. I don't know what hurts more, that I'm still picking glass out of my hand or that my mum is still ranting about the water I'd spilt. FML

#13046005
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24452) - you deserved it (2310)

On 09/14/2010 at 6:44am - misc - by Lolzords - United Kingdom (London)

Today, my cousin came to visit from America. While out shopping, she said loudly that she was having trouble finding clothes to fit around her huge fanny, causing a lot of people to stare in our direction. I had to explain to her that "fanny" in the UK means "vagina." FML

#12975254
270 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34393) - you deserved it (3920)

On 09/09/2010 at 10:00am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, my girlfriend and I were role playing when her mum walked past the slightly open door, saw me, and chased me out of the house for stealing her baby's innocence. I was only wearing a red speedo. FML

#12775979
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12103) - you deserved it (33380)

On 08/27/2010 at 7:16pm - intimacy - by yeah - United Kingdom (London)

Today, my girlfriend asked me how big the Sun would be compared to the Earth. I didn't have anything on me to help demonstrate, so to imitate the Earth, I made a small hole with my index finger and thumb and said "Okay, imagine a ball this small." She then looked at my crotch. FML

#12769605
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24605) - you deserved it (11585)

On 08/27/2010 at 8:23am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, whilst I was working in McDonald's, a customer threw their Quarterpounder at me because it had pickles and he said he didn't want any pickles in his burger. I didn't even serve him. I'd just started my shift. FML

Today, I had to moisturise my dog's testicles because they got sunburnt. FML

#12305755
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40462) - you deserved it (7204)

On 08/04/2010 at 6:24am - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, my husband fell asleep for two hours at a dinner party. We were the hosts. FML

#11978791
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25205) - you deserved it (5024)

On 07/19/2010 at 4:34am - misc - by wideawake (woman) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I woke up to my boyfriend jumping on my bed exclaiming that he had "won the lottery." He broke the bed. Turns out he only won £15.80. FML

#11790299
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28950) - you deserved it (2754)

On 07/10/2010 at 8:03am - money - by Ecce (woman) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I decided to go on a diet to lose some weight before summer. This was followed by the arrival of a giant parcel full of candy from my mother. FML

#10481687
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22137) - you deserved it (5388)

On 05/12/2010 at 5:49am - health - by nick - United Kingdom (London)

Today, if it wasn't already embarrassing enough to tell my boyfriend I was on my period, I had to explain what a period is in the first place, how it works, and why it means nothing can happen during that time of the month. He's twenty. FML

#10435467
202 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43372) - you deserved it (5997)

On 05/09/2010 at 12:29pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (London)



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