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FMLs submitted from Lincolnshire

Today, I'm so strapped for cash that I smuggled toilet paper out of my mother's house. FML

#20660573
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32932) - you deserved it (5624)

On 05/13/2013 at 10:16am - money - by psychopumpkin - United Kingdom (Lincolnshire)

Today, I went with my friends to see a movie. I handed my student card over to the cashier as proof I was old enough to see it, and he started laughing hysterically at my picture. Then he called over a colleague, who also started laughing. FML

#19233268
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20337) - you deserved it (1817)

On 03/07/2012 at 1:51pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Lincolnshire)

Today, my girlfriend and I were getting frisky. She got my cock out, stopped, and told me it looked like "Rufus the naked mole rat." She spent the next 20 minutes showing me pictures, describing in detail why they looked similar, and laughing. FML

#17889582
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27727) - you deserved it (3657)

On 10/02/2011 at 6:57pm - intimacy - by rufusthepenis - United Kingdom (Lincolnshire)

Today, my son was eating a plum. I was busy in the kitchen, and he came running in saying "Mummy my plum is wet", I told him it was fine and bit a bit off to prove it. He looked at me and said "No Mummy! Can you wash it please, I dropped it in my potty". I feel ill. FML

#17606704
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24458) - you deserved it (6256)

On 08/28/2011 at 5:25pm - kids - by cjay2200 - United Kingdom (Lincolnshire)

Today, I had to make up a boyfriend to stop my lesbian roommate coming onto me. FML

#14021682
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25194) - you deserved it (4756)

On 11/29/2010 at 7:39am - intimacy - by katelouise2102 - United Kingdom (Lincolnshire)

Today, my grandmother gave me a sex talk on how I should take "precautions", right in the middle of a packed bus station. I'm 21. FML

#8290111
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11115) - you deserved it (1250)

On 02/15/2010 at 5:02am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Lincolnshire)

Today, for the third time this week, my boss made me switch desks. Each new desk is closer to the door than the last one. I think he's trying to tell me something. FML

#6479352
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22459) - you deserved it (1708)

On 11/27/2009 at 2:51pm - work - by Fmyoffice (man) - United Kingdom (Lincolnshire)

Today, I found out my teacher writes descriptions next to people's names on the register to remind him who people were. By mistake the descriptions appeared on the computer projector. Next to my name it said "Tubby". FML

#30377
27 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34881) - you deserved it (4229)

On 02/12/2009 at 8:37am - misc - by atterz123 (man) - United Kingdom (Lincolnshire)

Today, I went back to my flat after a night on the town and staying at my girlfriend's. My flat was flooded. I had been sick in the sink and left the tap on all night. FML

#2294
12 comments

I agree, your life sucks (3517) - you deserved it (14552)

On 01/23/2009 at 7:08am - misc - by Moe - United Kingdom (Lincolnshire)



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