Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

FMLs submitted from Kentucky

Today, I asked my boyfriend to spend the night at my house because my dad would be working out of town, and once the rest of the house left I thought it'd be sweet if he snuck in my room and slept with me. His reply was "Why bother? You're on your period, it's not like we can do anything." FML

#16556995
216 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44440) - you deserved it (12933)

On 06/08/2011 at 1:21am - intimacy - by kimboslice106 - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I posted my status on Facebook as "slightly hungover." My grandma commented on it with "liar, you were helping me clean last night." She's right. FML

#16221236
227 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13109) - you deserved it (63841)

On 05/17/2011 at 12:15pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I wanted to take my girlfriend to a nice dinner before prom. Her parents followed her in, and joined us to "keep an eye on me." They interrupted all our conversations, ate an expensive meal, then got up and walked out when the waitress brought the $95 check, leaving me to pay for it. FML

#15999720
240 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53159) - you deserved it (3983)

On 05/01/2011 at 1:50am - money - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, my bladder decided to empty itself while I was on a rollercoaster. FML

#15991792
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32741) - you deserved it (9772)

On 04/30/2011 at 3:03pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I promised my boyfriend a blow job every time he does the dishes. Every dish in the house has been washed three times already. FML

#15718627
307 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19298) - you deserved it (65936)

On 04/10/2011 at 1:07am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, the company I work for decided to "go green" and stopped using the air conditioner to cool down the office. It is currently 81 degrees at my desk. FML

#15681231
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29734) - you deserved it (4394)

On 04/07/2011 at 3:55pm - work - by Dave (man) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, my friend stole my phone to call the creepy boy that follows me around at school. I wouldn't have been so bothered if she hadn't had phone sex with him, all while pretending to be me. He got so into it, he now thinks we're a couple. FML

#15514869
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45797) - you deserved it (5752)

On 03/27/2011 at 2:09pm - intimacy - by Username - United States (Kentucky)

Today, my boyfriend called me and dumped me. Thirty minutes later he called asking for me back. When I asked why, he said "The other girl dumped me." FML

#15248393
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42615) - you deserved it (4044)

On 03/09/2011 at 3:27am - love - by life_isnt_fair (woman) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I cleaned up my dog's crap after my wife asked me. 5 minutes later she yelled at me for being lazy as she slammed the door leaving for work. My dog shit in the exact same spot apparently to make me look stupid. FML

#14952962
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33898) - you deserved it (3278)

On 02/12/2011 at 9:17pm - animals - by Username - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I discovered my fiancé has been telling everyone else we are just friends, yet last night he wanted me to go with him to pick up my engagement ring. I'm supposing the wedding will be a surprise to everyone. FML

#14721609
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26503) - you deserved it (3099)

On 01/26/2011 at 4:26pm - love - by Unreality (woman) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I bought something special at Victoria's Secret, then sat in bumper-to-bumper traffic for 2 hours to get to my boyfriend's house. When I got there, he broke up with me. We're 37 years old and he actually gave me the "it's not you, it's me" speech. FML

#14645700
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29179) - you deserved it (2955)

On 01/20/2011 at 12:04am - love - by singleladynow (woman) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, my boyfriend and I spent 30 minutes listening to my grandmother telling us that my cat is a medium. My boyfriend is totally convinced. FML

#14583588
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20575) - you deserved it (2948)

On 01/14/2011 at 11:24pm - animals - by inchetogb - United States (Kentucky)

Today, for the first time ever, my boyfriend of one year told me he loved me. He was calling me by collect call from the county jail. FML

#14485086
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26283) - you deserved it (5612)

On 01/06/2011 at 12:38pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Kentucky)



Bénédicte's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • The Xmas illustrated FML
  • Here we go, final lap before Christmas is finally upon us. Although, you could say we've been subjected to quite a few strains of Christmas already. The decorations are up since mid-August, and certain family…

Friday 19 December 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: