Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

FMLs submitted from Kentucky

Today, I was stuck in my apartment complex's elevator. I was shouting out for help when a voice came screaming, "This is the fire department." I was relieved until he said, "Just kidding." FML

#20681121
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43359) - you deserved it (2773)

On 05/23/2013 at 1:11am - misc - by Mylifesucks - United States (Kentucky)

Today, my girlfriend decided we are to the point in our relationship that it's considered acceptable to take a dump while I'm in there showering. FML

Today, a man I once worked with passed away. He was a lovely, caring, and inspirational person whom I looked up to. My husband's form of consolation? "Old people die. Get over it." FML

#20538776
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26444) - you deserved it (2635)

On 03/10/2013 at 10:47pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I was at my boyfriend's grandmother's house meeting her for the first time. I excused myself to the restroom and as I walked out of the room I heard her say, "You could do a lot better. She's fat." Then I heard my boyfriend reply, "I know." FML

#20511747
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43641) - you deserved it (4875)

On 02/18/2013 at 2:09am - love - by Anonymous - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I had to convince my dad that text lingo causes brain damage just to try to get him to stop. He actually believed me, and is telling everyone they have, or will receive brain damage soon. FML

#20504918
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9905) - you deserved it (23499)

On 02/13/2013 at 11:45am - misc - by oh my dad - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I was discussing with my husband how it was time I stopped taking birth control so we could have a baby. He looked at me and said sincerely, "We're a little young to be having kids, don't you think?". He's 35 and I'm 32. FML

#20469230
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30964) - you deserved it (4484)

On 01/20/2013 at 8:13am - love - by StillTooYoung (woman) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I started at my first job. Within the first five minutes of arriving, I was followed around by a white guy who repeatedly sang to me, "Black people love making music" along with a few of his own songs. It resulted in me getting fired for bringing my "boyfriend" to work. I didn't even know him. FML

#20163535
32 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17522) - you deserved it (1281)

On 11/14/2012 at 8:04pm - work - by sarahijklmnop (woman) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I got fired from a job that I've had for four days for being too "secretive." Apparently, I was leaning over my notebook so that my boss couldn't stand behind me and read what I was writing. The email literally said I was "being too sneaky". They were work notes. FML

#20132367
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17577) - you deserved it (1343)

On 10/25/2012 at 2:59am - work - by TheHarvardian (woman) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, while my husband and I were arguing, he walked away in the middle of my sentence yelling, "Remember babe, you're only my current wife!" FML

#20064293
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20636) - you deserved it (4184)

On 09/09/2012 at 4:34am - love - by JB (woman) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I found out that the mysterious and creepy weirdo guy that continuously sends me messages on Facebook is my manager at my new job. FML

#20060179
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18859) - you deserved it (1492)

On 09/06/2012 at 7:15am - work - by Jessica S. (woman) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I realized the fastest way to wake up isn't from an alarm clock. It's from the warm, wet sensation of your old and senile cat peeing on you and your bed. I swear he was smiling. FML

#20033618
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19933) - you deserved it (2321)

On 08/21/2012 at 9:04am - animals - by jenA - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I had an ovarian cyst rupture at work, causing sudden severe stomach cramps; this caused my bowels to release everything right then and there, while on the phone with a customer, in the middle of the call center surrounded by 200 other sales reps. FML

#19991299
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26294) - you deserved it (1232)

On 07/29/2012 at 7:34pm - health - by sy123 (woman) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, the power went out in my area. My wife and I were bored so I lit some candles, poured some wine, and left little to her imagination about what my intent was. We cuddled a while and as I leaned in for a kiss the power came back on. She was more excited that the WiFi was back than anything. FML

#19986265
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19919) - you deserved it (1752)

On 07/26/2012 at 10:55pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Kentucky)



Bénédicte's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Bénédicte's Illustrated FML
  • "If drawing stuff is the food of love, then get a better pencil." That's not a real expression, I just made it up because I needed a good opening line. It's not even that good of an opening line, but…

Thursday 10 April 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: