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FMLs submitted from Kentucky

Today, a girl asked me out on a date to some hot springs, about 2 hours away. After a mile hike, the springs were finally in sight. She then slipped and cut her shin open. I had carry her the mile back and drive her the 2 hours to the ER, where her parents, whom I'd never met, were waiting. FML

#21156317
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47863) - you deserved it (4198)

On 05/29/2014 at 7:46pm - love - by jonchavez - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I was trolling on a My Little Pony forum. I was midway through typing a big post, calling them all a bunch of attention-seeking losers who act like morons because their parents never loved them, when I broke down in tears, realizing I'd just perfectly described myself. FML

#21133397
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20568) - you deserved it (55828)

On 05/07/2014 at 5:25pm - misc - by I suck :( (man) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, my Spanish teacher imitated the sound of a coffee grinder, and then said in Spanish, "OK, all of you do it." I did it, thinking everyone else would too. I was the only one in the class who'd understood the Spanish part. FML

#21121714
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41276) - you deserved it (4760)

On 04/24/2014 at 11:32am - work - by me - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I watched a drunk guy getting thrown out of a bar, then get tased on the sidewalk outside. He was our designated driver. FML

#21110183
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38880) - you deserved it (5415)

On 04/11/2014 at 9:48am - misc - by brodinn (man) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, my neighbor asked to come over and use my laptop. She showed up drunk, grabbed my boobs, and asked if I'd ever had a lesbian experience. We both have husbands and kids; the kids were in the room. FML

#21109873
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52428) - you deserved it (5209)

On 04/10/2014 at 10:32pm - intimacy - by freakedout (woman) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, while working at Dairy Queen, a customer asked me what was so special about our ice cream cakes, and how they're different from regular cakes. I chuckled, and told her it's because they're made from ice cream. She threw a fit, which resulted in me being written up and sent home early. FML

#21096589
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38314) - you deserved it (5698)

On 03/25/2014 at 11:53pm - work - by Coryj1220 - United States (Kentucky)

Today, three days before I take my bar exam, the biggest exam of my life, I got my monthly. And I get to bring my belongings in a clear plastic bag so the world knows. FML

#21092507
213 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42471) - you deserved it (8494)

On 03/21/2014 at 7:09am - health - by SeriouslyMakeItStop (woman) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I told my husband to give our dog a bath while I was at work. When I returned home, I found my dog, along with my husband, in the bath together. FML

#21074688
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40403) - you deserved it (9347)

On 03/01/2014 at 3:23am - animals - by lacy - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I walked in on my dad singing along to a song on Sesame Street. He tried to divert attention from what I'd just witnessed by angrily grilling me over "just barging in" and not respecting people's privacy. Apparently he forgot that we were in the living room. FML

#21062479
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35822) - you deserved it (3463)

On 02/16/2014 at 2:21pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, while playing badminton at school, I got an opponent who is mentally handicapped. Since I'm terrible at the game, I guess the teacher assumed it would be a good match. I won the match, my first victory ever. My teacher accused me of cheating to humiliate him. FML

#21045157
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41032) - you deserved it (4014)

On 01/30/2014 at 1:13pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I found a job after two years of searching. I excitedly called my best friend to tell her the good news. She decided break her own news about how she quit yet another good paying job and found an even better one within hours. FML

Today, I had to go tree shopping with my dad and some of his work buddies. It hit its lowest point when one loudly told us about a crap handjob he got recently. "I mean yeah, choke the cock," he said, "but don't choke it to DEATH, nam'sayin'?" I'd never wanted to just drop dead more. FML

#20993322
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35154) - you deserved it (3045)

On 12/15/2013 at 12:18pm - misc - by ANONYMOUS -_- (woman) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, my mom said I should start wearing push up bras to make myself look better. I was wearing one when she said that. FML

#20976101
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40951) - you deserved it (3467)

On 11/30/2013 at 7:16pm - misc - by flatchested Sam - United States (Kentucky)



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