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FMLs submitted from Kansas

Today, I was addressed by name by the liquor store clerk. I've never told him my name. He's just seen my ID many times. FML

#18837494
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7227) - you deserved it (25416)

On 01/17/2012 at 7:21pm - health - by Matchtopia - United States (Kansas)

Today, I decided to get my ass in shape and went to the gym. I got motion-sickness on the elliptical. FML

#18778182
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20048) - you deserved it (5112)

On 01/11/2012 at 7:31pm - health - by tbw (woman) - United States (Kansas)

Today, I was going over to my friend's house for the first time. A creepy-looking old man answered, and smiled at me. I asked "Is this the right house? Does Isaac live here?" He replied "Yes, he's in the basement. Would you like a drink?" Right then, Isaac called and asked me where I was. FML

#18671217
261 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46599) - you deserved it (3233)

On 01/01/2012 at 2:34am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Kansas)

Today, my boyfriend and I got into trouble with his mother for me still being at their house at 1:00 am. I'm 24, he's 22 and we really were studying. FML

#18492041
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29183) - you deserved it (4339)

On 12/12/2011 at 2:44am - love - by smurfisurfer1 - United States (Kansas)

Today, on a dating site, I was matched with my brother, again. FML

#18128656
220 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46988) - you deserved it (5371)

On 11/01/2011 at 12:18pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Kansas)

Today, my landlord compared me to his idiot son for not plunging a toilet. This is the same toilet he explicitly told me not to plunge last week, because of a possible leak into the basement. We have been peeing outside for a week waiting on him. FML

#17996860
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24111) - you deserved it (2169)

On 10/16/2011 at 8:47am - misc - by Carl - United States (Kansas)

Today, I went to my gyn to see what a painful lump is under my armpit. Turns out it's breast tissue, and yes, it will fill up with milk when I'm pregnant. I essentially have three boobs. FML

#17743862
212 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34261) - you deserved it (2355)

On 09/14/2011 at 12:34pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (Kansas)

Today, I woke up with a foul stench forcing its way up my nostrils. It turns out our septic tank broke, and is now leaking into our backyard, and sadly, our basement. I live in the basement. FML

#17460789
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26030) - you deserved it (2333)

On 08/13/2011 at 3:04pm - misc - by thatguythere858 (man) - United States (Kansas)

Today, I was browsing the web when I checked the search history. Turns out my son has been searching for "nude grills" and "hot grills." Not only is my 12-year-old son attempting to find porn on the internet, he also can't spell. FML

#17281952
243 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36852) - you deserved it (5547)

On 07/27/2011 at 10:02pm - intimacy - by Nickname (man) - United States (Kansas)

Today, I actually resorted to checking the newspaper obituaries to see where the deceased were employed, just so I can find a job opening. FML

#16922992
215 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34741) - you deserved it (4783)

On 06/30/2011 at 1:44pm - money - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Kansas)

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me. His reason was because he's moving away for college. That won't be for another year. FML

#16751936
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26403) - you deserved it (4343)

On 06/19/2011 at 9:20pm - love - by youngblood (woman) - United States (Kansas)

Today, I came home from work to find my computer smashed into a hundred pieces. My dad threw it at my mom because they were having a fight and my computer was the closest thing to throw. He refuses to fix it. FML

Today, my crush and I were talking on the phone and we were really hitting it off. We got on the subject of sex and I told him I have a purity ring. Then he suddenly said he had to go and hang up. FML

#16277483
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23754) - you deserved it (42872)

On 05/21/2011 at 3:44am - love - by Cassie (woman) - United States (Kansas)



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