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FMLs submitted from Indiana

Today, I was driving at night and saw a small animal run across the road. I slammed on my brakes and got rear-ended. The animal turned out to be a plastic grocery bag. FML

#187356
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46362) - you deserved it (14252)

On 03/02/2009 at 7:09pm - misc - by himtopia19 (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, at work, we finally got a digital projector so our theater can show 3D movies. Our first movie is The Jonas Brothers Concert. FML

#137064
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (65238) - you deserved it (8478)

On 02/25/2009 at 8:31pm - misc - by Noname (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, I went to the hair salon to cut 6 in. off my hair. When I got there I decided to get my upper lip waxed for the first time. When my boyfriend came to pick me up for our date I asked if he noticed anything different about me, the first thing he said was "I see you got rid of you mustache." FML

#115837
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42230) - you deserved it (9528)

On 02/23/2009 at 6:09pm - misc - by hey-o (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, while on a blind date at Hooters, I ordered my food and the waitress asked me if I was stoned, because she couldn't understand me. I have a speech impediment. FML

#98933
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54225) - you deserved it (3780)

On 02/21/2009 at 8:15pm - health - by Vince (man) - United States (Indiana)

Today, my tattoo artist boyfriend of five months gave me my first tattoo in celebration of my 18th birthday. It was supposed to be a heart with my name in script. He spelled my name wrong. FML

#70585
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54511) - you deserved it (15040)

On 02/18/2009 at 6:20pm - misc - by authentic (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, I was eating at a restaurant with my boyfriend, he is 6'2 and i am 4'11. Out of nowhere, the hostess started openly flirting with him, and asked him if he needed a booster chair for his daughter. FML

#70392
202 comments

I agree, your life sucks (73441) - you deserved it (4478)

On 02/18/2009 at 5:57pm - misc - by not-so-young-shortie (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, at the gym, I see a person laying unconscious on the ground with people crowded around. Previously being a lifeguard, and knowing CPR, I ran over and asked a man what happened, preparing to check his vitals. I then realized that the body was a dummy and the employees were doing a drill. FML

#50610
29 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14021) - you deserved it (26871)

On 02/16/2009 at 12:35am - misc - by thedullard (man) - United States (Indiana)

Today, on campus, these really overly-happy people walking around with big signs saying "free hugs". When I walked towards them, their smiles faded, and they put their signs down. FML

#38092
32 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45759) - you deserved it (4107)

On 02/13/2009 at 4:51pm - misc - by shit's weak - United States (Indiana)

Today, my best friend told me she wanted to rape my throat. I did not know that was possible. FML

#14570
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23523) - you deserved it (4682)

On 02/08/2009 at 3:04am - misc - by N (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, the creepy skin care guy at the mall with the heavy accent asked me if I was pregnant. When I said no he replied "Oh, too many donuts then?" FML

#13891
29 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29676) - you deserved it (7133)

On 02/07/2009 at 7:54pm - misc - by notpreggers (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, my mom was telling me a funny story about when I was young. So I said 'yeah I was funny huh?' She replied 'Yep, I had a funny one and a pretty one'. FML

#13534
13 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30334) - you deserved it (2144)

On 02/07/2009 at 3:42pm - misc - by Noname - United States (Indiana)

Today, I woke up to my car covered in shaving cream and tampons and the word CHEATER written on my windshield in lipstick. The guy a few doors down from me in my dorm has the same car as me. I'm a virgin. FML

#10643
25 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42890) - you deserved it (2002)

On 02/05/2009 at 5:34pm - misc - by CB4 (man) - United States (Indiana)

Today, my girlfriend's guinea pig managed to go down her shirt. I have been dating her for 3 weeks and I haven't even kissed her yet. FML

#6301
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18927) - you deserved it (39362)

On 02/03/2009 at 12:22pm - intimacy - by Merdoc (man) - United States (Indiana)



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