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FMLs submitted from Indiana

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me. She gave me back the brand new box of 12 condoms that I had bought and left at her house. There were 8 left and I wasn't the one who opened them. FML

#811119
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (89604) - you deserved it (5912)

On 04/05/2009 at 1:04am - intimacy - by knicksfan (man) - United States (Indiana)

Today, I filled out a political survey for a psychology experiment. A really cute girl was doing it, too. We hit it off and flirted through the surveys, and I asked her out when it was done. Then I found out it was really an attraction experiment and she was in on it. She was acting. FML

#783275
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (73112) - you deserved it (6946)

On 04/03/2009 at 2:40pm - love - by Troy (man) - United States (Indiana)

Today, my best friend who I have been secretly in love with forever, was ranting about her ex-girlfriend. Then she said : "If only you were gay, we'd be perfect for each other." So I took the chance to tell her I was. She responded : "Well I am still not attracted to you though." FML

#207731
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (69714) - you deserved it (7167)

On 03/04/2009 at 4:03pm - love - by alone_forever (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, I was driving at night and saw a small animal run across the road. I slammed on my brakes and got rear-ended. The animal turned out to be a plastic grocery bag. FML

#187356
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46275) - you deserved it (14225)

On 03/02/2009 at 7:09pm - misc - by himtopia19 (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, at work, we finally got a digital projector so our theater can show 3D movies. Our first movie is The Jonas Brothers Concert. FML

#137064
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (65122) - you deserved it (8462)

On 02/25/2009 at 8:31pm - misc - by Noname (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, I went to the hair salon to cut 6 in. off my hair. When I got there I decided to get my upper lip waxed for the first time. When my boyfriend came to pick me up for our date I asked if he noticed anything different about me, the first thing he said was "I see you got rid of you mustache." FML

#115837
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42117) - you deserved it (9520)

On 02/23/2009 at 6:09pm - misc - by hey-o (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, while on a blind date at Hooters, I ordered my food and the waitress asked me if I was stoned, because she couldn't understand me. I have a speech impediment. FML

#98933
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54089) - you deserved it (3771)

On 02/21/2009 at 8:15pm - health - by Vince (man) - United States (Indiana)

Today, my tattoo artist boyfriend of five months gave me my first tattoo in celebration of my 18th birthday. It was supposed to be a heart with my name in script. He spelled my name wrong. FML

#70585
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53715) - you deserved it (14697)

On 02/18/2009 at 6:20pm - misc - by authentic (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, I was eating at a restaurant with my boyfriend, he is 6'2 and i am 4'11. Out of nowhere, the hostess started openly flirting with him, and asked him if he needed a booster chair for his daughter. FML

#70392
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (72526) - you deserved it (4409)

On 02/18/2009 at 5:57pm - misc - by not-so-young-shortie (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, at the gym, I see a person laying unconscious on the ground with people crowded around. Previously being a lifeguard, and knowing CPR, I ran over and asked a man what happened, preparing to check his vitals. I then realized that the body was a dummy and the employees were doing a drill. FML

#50610
29 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13962) - you deserved it (26774)

On 02/16/2009 at 12:35am - misc - by thedullard (man) - United States (Indiana)

Today, on campus, these really overly-happy people walking around with big signs saying "free hugs". When I walked towards them, their smiles faded, and they put their signs down. FML

#38092
31 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45650) - you deserved it (4094)

On 02/13/2009 at 4:51pm - misc - by shit's weak - United States (Indiana)

Today, my best friend told me she wanted to rape my throat. I did not know that was possible. FML

#14570
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23421) - you deserved it (4675)

On 02/08/2009 at 3:04am - misc - by N (woman) - United States (Indiana)



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