Today, I lit a cigarette in the opposite direction of the wind. My hair blew into it, and caught on fire. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9598) - you deserved it (47138)
On 02/12/2009 at 8:28am - misc - by a genius (woman) - United States (Illinois)
Today, at work, a man walked up the escalator with his chubby kid next to him and asked me where the shoe section was. I said, "For you or your son?" He said, "For my daughter." FML
I agree, your life sucks (8725) - you deserved it (23744)
On 02/12/2009 at 1:13am - misc - by Mal2222 (woman) - United States (Illinois)
Today, as I sat on the table in my gynecologist's office for my yearly checkup, I realized that was the most action I got in the past year. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33577) - you deserved it (6920)
On 02/11/2009 at 3:04pm - misc - by dynomyte (woman) - United States (Illinois)
Today, a flight attendant asked me if I was airsick because I looked really pale. I told her that was my normal complexion but thanked her for her concern. She insisted "No, that can't be normal." FML
I agree, your life sucks (29776) - you deserved it (1799)
On 02/11/2009 at 12:16am - misc - by Casper (man) - United States (Illinois)
Today, I got this huge package at my college dorm from my parents with candy, chips, canned soup and all these goodies. When I called my mom to thank her, she replied "We got rid of your cat, Annie". FML
I agree, your life sucks (30102) - you deserved it (1671)
On 02/10/2009 at 8:44pm - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Illinois)
Today, my sister teased me about being a mistake baby. When I told my mom what my sister said, her response was "I still love you anyway". FML
I agree, your life sucks (29160) - you deserved it (2507)
On 02/10/2009 at 6:41pm - misc - by melissa (woman) - United States (Illinois)
Today, I was on the internet with my Dad looking up information about allergies. I began to type 'allergies' into the Google Search Box and as I typed 'a', the phrase 'amazing sex positions' popped up as a search I had already looked up. My Dad asked me if any of the positions worked out. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9909) - you deserved it (35728)
On 02/10/2009 at 3:46pm - intimacy - by Noname (woman) - United States (Illinois)
Today, my tennis coach showed up to practice in an all white outfit. I exclaimed, "You're looking very white today!" He's African American. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7073) - you deserved it (33767)
On 02/10/2009 at 12:59am - misc - by Tennisplayer (woman) - United States (Illinois)
Today, I finally reunited with a lot of old friends from school. It was great to see everyone grown up and hear the stories. At the end we decided to have a group photo for old times sake. They asked me to take the picture. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34595) - you deserved it (1607)
On 02/09/2009 at 7:43pm - misc - by p00p_m0nsta (man) - United States (Illinois)
Today, a girl entered the public washroom I was washing my hands in. When she saw me, she stopped dead in her tracks. I then saw her go to the door to make sure she was actually in the girl's washroom. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30320) - you deserved it (3780)
On 02/09/2009 at 6:57pm - misc - by a manly woman? (woman) - United States (Illinois)
Today, I visited my 78 year old grandmother. She thanked me for visiting and gave me a magazine before I left telling me I might find something I like in there. When I got home I looked at the magazine only to realize it's full of dildos and sextoys. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30181) - you deserved it (2146)
On 02/09/2009 at 2:51am - intimacy - by V (woman) - United States (Illinois)
Today, on my way home from watching a movie with a girl, I began having an erection because I thought I could kiss her goodnight. She dropped me off at home, and with my full blown erection, I walked in front of her car with the headlights on. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8469) - you deserved it (32218)
On 02/08/2009 at 8:01pm - intimacy - by dgordo3 (man) - United States (Illinois)
Today, the alarm on my phone went off. I picked it up, hit snooze, and dropped it back on my desk without looking. I woke up an hour later to find that I had dropped it directly in a full glass of water. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8841) - you deserved it (15885)
On 02/07/2009 at 7:53pm - misc - by tarheels526 (man) - United States (Illinois)
Monday 20 May 2013
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