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Today, I was babysitting three little kids. I decided to give one of them (a seven-year-old) a piggy-back ride, thinking I'm strong enough. I managed to get a few feet before faceplanting on the wooden floor. She is fine though, no pain or anything. My face took the impact for both of us. FML
Today, I was pointing out my car to my roommate. He responded with, "Oh that one with the broken window?" Turns out my car had been broken into. They took my CD player, GPS and Ipod. On top of that they left a Reese's Fastbreak wrapper and sunflower seeds on my front seat. FML
Today, I made a batch of "special" brownies for a party I was going to tonight. I wrapped them up and put them on the counter with a note that said DO NOT EAT. Later on I came home from some errands to find a tray of half eaten brownies and my ten year old sister passed out on the couch. FML
Today, while arguing with my boyfriend about how I wasn't a bad driver and could parallel park, I decided it was easier to just let him do it. Unfortunately, while getting out of the car to switch seats, I forgot to take the car out of drive and it ran into the car in front of us. He was right. FML
Today, after having sexual intercourse with my boyfriend, we went downstairs to find his parents had come home early and had heard everything. I then received a long scolding from his mother of how I'd disrespected her house. My boyfriend received a high-five and a thumbs-up from his dad. FML
Friday 28 August 2015