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FMLs submitted from Illinois

Today, I heard on the news that the average debt one is in when they graduate college is $24,000. I've been in college for one year and my debt is already $20,000. And it turns out that my school's accreditation does not exist like I was told. $20,000 in debt and no college credits to show for it. FML

#13582834
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23732) - you deserved it (6960)

On 10/24/2010 at 10:16pm - money - by krissysays (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my dad got a new phone and put me on speed dial. I have received several voice mails from him accidentally dialed. They are from him riding the train, in a meeting, having lunch, and, most recently, him taking a monstrous dump. FML

#13527563
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28792) - you deserved it (3056)

On 10/20/2010 at 6:22pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I met my roommate for the first time. I walked in the door to see him in full Roman gladiator gear, screaming at the computer because he lost 18 knights. He also told me he wakes up every 3 hours to make sure his army is still intact. FML

#13521547
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36613) - you deserved it (3096)

On 10/20/2010 at 3:00am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I received two cards in the mail for my late husband for his birthday. He has been dead for four years now, and the cards were from our two children, who live several states away. This is the fourth time it's happened, and neither of them answer my calls. Ever. FML

#13514836
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42655) - you deserved it (3326)

On 10/19/2010 at 6:58pm - kids - by widow - United States (Illinois)

Today, my fiancé proposed to me. I was really excited until he asked, "Can we go halfsies on the ring?" FML

Today, I met a guy that I liked. We really hit it off, that is until his parents walked by and he started begging them, down on his hands and knees, to buy him a new video game. FML

#13454084
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26923) - you deserved it (3830)

On 10/15/2010 at 12:18am - love - by lilshoobydoo14 - United States (Illinois)

Today, I allowed my friend to practice driving in my car. As she began to let the car roll forward, she looked at me and very seriously asked, "Brakes is the right pedal, right?" FML

#13440405
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9636) - you deserved it (27603)

On 10/13/2010 at 11:08pm - misc - by holly10350 (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was working on my family genealogy. I found out that my best friend's great-grandfather murdered my great-grandfather. FML

#13337964
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37720) - you deserved it (3505)

On 10/06/2010 at 12:32am - misc - by cantstoplaughing (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I told the girl I've been seeing for a while about the strong feelings that I have for her and that I was falling in love. She told me my words made her realize what it felt like to be in love. My words were so powerful, in fact, that she ran right back into the arms of her ex boyfriend. FML

#13331586
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35777) - you deserved it (3331)

On 10/05/2010 at 5:27pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my car was stolen. I got it back later without the engine, any of the wheels or my brand new radio and speakers. They even took my car mats. FML

#13323289
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28247) - you deserved it (2275)

On 10/04/2010 at 10:39pm - misc - by Ro (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I went to sit on the ground next to my crush at our college's free concert. Just as I took the final step toward him, somone ran into me causing me to trip and kick him in the crotch. He had to go to the emergency room. FML

Today, I found out my older brother put tanning lotion in the lotion I use to masturbate with. Now I have orange palms and an orange penis which won't go away for weeks. FML

#13278835
321 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18689) - you deserved it (43174)

On 10/01/2010 at 6:12pm - intimacy - by caughtorangehanded (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I got a spray tan for homecoming. While I was dancing, I got really sweaty and the spray tan rubbed off on the guy's white tux. FML

#13241516
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9205) - you deserved it (46401)

On 09/28/2010 at 9:47pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Illinois)



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