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FMLs submitted from Illinois

Today, I was having dinner with my boyfriend. We'd just got our food when my dad walks in, comes up to our table and says, "I didn't say you could leave, you're too young to be dating him", then drags me out of the restaurant. We are both 15, and it was my first date. FML

#16903308
409 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40538) - you deserved it (12277)

On 06/28/2011 at 8:51pm - misc - by Fresca11 - United States (Illinois)

Today, my extremely in-shape boyfriend told me he hasn't had a chance to work out lately. I jokingly poked him in the belly saying he's getting chunky and winked. He burst into tears. FML

#16871149
293 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23085) - you deserved it (35831)

On 06/26/2011 at 9:08pm - health - by kaplwv116 - United States (Illinois)

Today, I got mugged. As the guys who took my purse were about to walk away, my cellphone rang in my pocket. FML

#16812585
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37752) - you deserved it (2888)

On 06/23/2011 at 4:54am - money - by alo1434 (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my mom sold our electronic stuff to pay for hurricane shutters. We live in Chicago. FML

#16801509
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30346) - you deserved it (2567)

On 06/22/2011 at 4:05pm - money - by knevs - United States (Illinois)

Today, I went to the movies with my friend and two pretty girls. During the movie, he made out with both of them, while I sat there awkwardly and watched the movie. FML

#16727847
256 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43508) - you deserved it (5393)

On 06/18/2011 at 11:43am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was almost done getting ready for a really big date, when I heard my dad call for help from outside. I rushed downstairs and out the door, only to be ambushed and showered by my father with the garden hose. FML

#16714165
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31331) - you deserved it (3708)

On 06/17/2011 at 3:58pm - love - by anonymous - United States (Illinois)

Today, I found out that as a supervisor, if you reprimand a female worker and end the conversation with "Now get back to making sandwiches." your boss will consider it sexism and suspend you. I work at Subway. FML

#16589228
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50247) - you deserved it (7804)

On 06/10/2011 at 1:01am - work - by MakeMeASandwich (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I gave my husband an ultimatum: either he could have sex with me or play Minecraft. Needless to say, he spent the rest of the evening playing Minecraft. FML

#16467610
388 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35827) - you deserved it (13077)

On 06/02/2011 at 12:52pm - intimacy - by minecraftwilldie - United States (Illinois)

Today, my only motivation to get out of bed was cupcakes in the refrigerator. FML

#16416160
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27830) - you deserved it (15018)

On 05/30/2011 at 10:59am - health - by skigal24 - United States (Illinois)

Today, I noticed my hidden porn folder on my laptop had been renamed to "LOL". I live with my teenage daughter, and no one else. FML

#16383481
208 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15058) - you deserved it (56563)

On 05/28/2011 at 5:24am - intimacy - by redhanded (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was so lonely that I was comforted by the sound of mice running through the walls of my apartment. I left cheese and peanut butter out for them to find so that I could at least have a pet for company. FML

#16338275
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30786) - you deserved it (9004)

On 05/25/2011 at 1:28am - misc - by Anon (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was driving back home with my mom when we saw two squirrels having sex in the road. I told her to just honk the horn. She said that I was being selfish, that sex is a beautiful thing, and that we should let them finish. We sat there for at least five minutes. FML

#16287224
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41818) - you deserved it (5608)

On 05/21/2011 at 9:00pm - intimacy - by squirrels69ing (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, for the first time all month I felt truly proud and accomplished. I finally figured out how to change the toilet seat. FML

#16246614
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10275) - you deserved it (20511)

On 05/18/2011 at 11:48pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Illinois)



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