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FMLs submitted from Illinois

Today, my clingy girlfriend refused to leave me alone long enough for me to read an article about dealing with clingy girlfriends. FML

#21095315
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41185) - you deserved it (5941)

On 03/24/2014 at 4:28pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Illinois)

Today, I found out why my dad always treated me badly as a kid compared to my siblings. It's because I was conceived while my mom was cheating on him. On top of that, he made it clear that he still doesn't consider me a "real" part of the family. FML

#21091901
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51128) - you deserved it (2992)

On 03/20/2014 at 4:23pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I had a music duet in front of a crowd and 3 judges. I play tuba and my partner plays the saxophone. He burst out laughing in the middle of it because one note that I played sounded like a fart. FML

#21082619
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38399) - you deserved it (4197)

On 03/09/2014 at 10:09pm - misc - by some band player - United States (Illinois)

Today, after weeks of summoning up the courage to come out of the closet to my best friend, I told her I was gay. Immediately after she started cracking up, thinking it was a joke. I was so confused and nervous, I went along with it. She still thinks I'm straight. FML

#21078266
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40544) - you deserved it (6649)

On 03/04/2014 at 9:46pm - misc - by augiedd (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I made myself a hot pocket for lunch. I managed to scald myself on the red-hot cheese, and at the same time bite into the center, which was somehow still frozen solid. FML

#21073990
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34472) - you deserved it (6496)

On 02/28/2014 at 12:13pm - health - by loserr (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I wanted to pretend to have a seizure so my baby sister could know when to call 911. When I fell down and started to pretend, she decided to drink my soda instead of helping me. FML

#21071750
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37625) - you deserved it (14750)

On 02/25/2014 at 10:50pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I found out that my son set up a telescope in the attic not so he could study astronomy like he told me, but so he could spy on the girl across the street. FML

#21070645
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34747) - you deserved it (6565)

On 02/24/2014 at 7:51pm - kids - by sonwhy - United States (Illinois)

Today, I ran into my favorite teacher from high school, the one that really inspired me to become one myself. I told her that I'm in my last year of college preparing to become a teacher, to which she replied, "Wow, they really are letting anyone have a crack at being a teacher these days." FML

#21067542
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42379) - you deserved it (4445)

On 02/21/2014 at 11:32am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, at my therapy appointment, I was spilling my guts to my therapist. When I'd finished, to get rid of the awkward silence, I asked, "I'm not crazy, right?" His response was, "That's bit of a loaded question." FML

#21066990
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34393) - you deserved it (5266)

On 02/20/2014 at 9:46pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was singing while driving through the car park. I blacked out trying to hit a high note, and ended up bashing into another car. FML

#21063366
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22593) - you deserved it (39159)

On 02/17/2014 at 12:43pm - money - by Anonymous - United States (Illinois)

Today, I aced my solo during my band concert. My parents were asleep the whole time. FML

Today, trying to do something nice for my brother, I filled up his truck's gas tank. I didn't realize until too late that it's a diesel. FML

#21056297
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37323) - you deserved it (19207)

On 02/10/2014 at 1:57pm - misc - by Shooting myself - United States (Illinois)

Today, I told my professor that I'll be missing class next week due to upcoming surgery. I asked if I could take the exam that I'd otherwise miss another day. He said no, and that I'd just have to take a failing grade, then wished me luck with the surgery. FML

#21053454
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49212) - you deserved it (3635)

On 02/07/2014 at 3:30pm - health - by ... - United States (Illinois)



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