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FMLs submitted from Illinois

Today, while working at Subway, a man ordered a sub with avocado. When I told him it was no longer available, he screamed, spit in my face and ran out, pushing over an innocent bystander in the process. FML

#17142025
183 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29790) - you deserved it (2848)

On 07/16/2011 at 10:46pm - work - by sandwichmaker - United States (Illinois)

Today, I caught a cab to take me to a hospital appointment. The driver turned around and told me I was in the Cash Cab. I got really excited and screamed. That is, until she laughed and said, "Just kidding. I always wanted to do that to someone." FML

#17128085
254 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33179) - you deserved it (8187)

On 07/15/2011 at 10:06pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Illinois)

Today, at a family reunion, my dad announced to everyone that I'd finally started my menstrual cycle. My grandmother started sobbing hysterically. FML

#17092331
195 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33985) - you deserved it (1993)

On 07/13/2011 at 9:31am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I saw a turtle on the road so I swerved, and hit a tree. The people behind me then hit the turtle. FML

#17078585
260 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28849) - you deserved it (8573)

On 07/12/2011 at 9:26am - misc - by turtle - United States (Illinois)

Today, I updated my facebook status to, "Party at my house this Friday. Like my status if you want to come." After about 3 hours I checked back to discover that the only person who'd liked my status was my grandma. FML

#17074594
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33110) - you deserved it (8770)

On 07/12/2011 at 12:40am - misc - by _Emilyy - United States (Illinois)

Today, my family got together to read my grandpa's will. He gave all of his grandkids $400 each. Except me. It seems he thought I'd see the funny side in being bequeathed a blow-up sex doll. FML

#17027029
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33881) - you deserved it (4410)

On 07/08/2011 at 11:10am - intimacy - by Jack - United States (Illinois)

Today, my girlfriend and I have been in a relationship for 3 years. She's pregnant. I'm a virgin. FML

#17023153
344 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45910) - you deserved it (8355)

On 07/08/2011 at 1:19am - love - by Nick (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my mom said we are having a party for the 4th of July. Her definition of a party is my grandma coming over. FML

#16974064
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23542) - you deserved it (3206)

On 07/04/2011 at 3:06pm - misc - by Kate - United States (Illinois)

Today, while working as a cashier at McDonald's, a man came in telling me that he had not received his hamburger. I looked at his receipt and the date said 11/17/09. FML

#16970431
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27188) - you deserved it (2602)

On 07/04/2011 at 5:42am - work - by crudofalife - United States (Illinois)

Today, while I thought my brother was playing with my new phone, he was actually texting a bunch of my friends that I have chlamydia. He deleted his texts so I wouldn't see them, and I spent a half-hour trying to figure out why I kept getting texts of shock and sympathy. We're both in our 20's. FML

#16945555
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27031) - you deserved it (3991)

On 07/02/2011 at 3:42am - misc - by Anonymouse (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was so broke that I paid for a $0.28 candy bar with my credit card. FML

#16938704
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22221) - you deserved it (10593)

On 07/01/2011 at 5:47pm - money - by Username - United States (Illinois)

Today, I broke my collarbone in a rugby tournament. I was forced to sit through five more hours of games because the coach wouldn't take me to the hospital until the tournament was over. FML

#16929999
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30041) - you deserved it (3052)

On 07/01/2011 at 12:15am - health - by nico (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was having dinner with my boyfriend. We'd just got our food when my dad walks in, comes up to our table and says, "I didn't say you could leave, you're too young to be dating him", then drags me out of the restaurant. We are both 15, and it was my first date. FML

#16903308
409 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38270) - you deserved it (11579)

On 06/28/2011 at 8:51pm - misc - by Fresca11 - United States (Illinois)



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