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FMLs submitted from Georgia

Today, I heard a commercial for a great apartment complex. Includes food, snacks, entertainment, activities, cleaning service, and transportation services if you cannot drive yourself. I was really excited until the end when they repeated the name; too bad my perfect place is a senior center. FML

#20514672
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23520) - you deserved it (7738)

On 02/20/2013 at 8:54am - misc - by kryan012 - United States (Georgia)

Today, I came home from a two-week vacation. When I walked into my house, I found cat poop everywhere. It took me several hours to clean it all up, and the house still smells terrible. The worst part is that I've never owned a cat in my life. FML

#20500118
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34639) - you deserved it (2140)

On 02/09/2013 at 8:39pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Georgia)

Today, while getting intimate with my girlfriend, I felt a sharp pain in my stomach, and had to run to the bathroom to evacuate my bowels. She heard the horrible sounds, and I doubt I'll ever be able to seduce her again. FML

#20480710
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30075) - you deserved it (3470)

On 01/27/2013 at 1:03am - love - by Anonymous - United States (Georgia)

Today, I've been struggling with my English paper for the past hour, because I can't concentrate. This is because my mom is in the room next to me, singing to her pet rat about what a cute little boy he is, in between yelling at him to stop "molesting" her. FML

#20452365
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31872) - you deserved it (2646)

On 01/10/2013 at 7:02pm - animals - by theycallmekitty (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, my wife and I had a fight, which I thought we resolved. Later, while painting the kitchen, I told her to change into an old shirt she didn't care about. She made a huge show of putting her wedding gown on, veil and all. FML

#20436663
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43385) - you deserved it (6104)

On 01/01/2013 at 4:33pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Georgia)

Today, at a post-Christmas party, I saw a cute girl standing underneath a mistletoe. I walked up to her and pointed out that we were both standing under a mistletoe. She looked at me, winced, and quickly walked away. FML

#20424412
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18340) - you deserved it (21239)

On 12/26/2012 at 9:09pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Georgia)

Today, I was listening to a local radio station, and they did a segment called "food porn." As they were sexually describing various types of food, I actually found myself getting turned on over a pizza. FML

#20411354
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34694) - you deserved it (9471)

On 12/21/2012 at 12:24pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Georgia)

Today, I had been trying to text my girlfriend all day, but no reply. After a while, I became worried so I called. She picked up and said, "Can't talk, busy." Not even a minute later, my best friend says to me, "Dude, tell your girlfriend to leave me alone. She's been texting me all day." FML

#20407951
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42284) - you deserved it (2771)

On 12/19/2012 at 6:31pm - misc - by SugarMyBalls (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, my fiancé called off our engagement after I contested his belief that women stop having periods after they are married. FML

#20404199
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35078) - you deserved it (3930)

On 12/17/2012 at 7:29pm - love - by kidyounot (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I had to break up with my boyfriend when I caught him installing cameras in my bathroom. FML

#20403401
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40626) - you deserved it (4340)

On 12/17/2012 at 7:25am - love - by Sarah (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I was doing a presentation in front of my boss. On the last slide, someone had put a picture of a man's cock. I later found out it was my boss who did it. It was his "good reason" to fire me. FML

#20199630
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29829) - you deserved it (1867)

On 12/10/2012 at 9:05pm - work - by golfstar11 - United States (Georgia)

Today, after doing inventory at my job, I was approached by a co-worker who I had always thought was cute. I tried talking to her, but it was hard as I kept trembling and stuttering from spending two hours in a meat locker. Now she assumes that I'm "special". FML

#20186264
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19490) - you deserved it (2038)

On 12/01/2012 at 3:35am - work - by CheddarJack89 (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I was told I look like a Simpson. I don't have blond hair, or any of the features of them. So I asked which one. I was told Homer because we both could use Weight Watchers and an education. FML

#20155893
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18317) - you deserved it (3800)

On 11/09/2012 at 1:57am - misc - by Kyle - United States (Georgia)



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