Today, at a job interview, my interviewer bent forward and I admired his ass. When he turned, I couldn't tell if he caught me or not. At the end of the interview he shook my hand in congratulations of getting the job, then said "Yes, I do work out." I have to see him everyday now. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7019) - you deserved it (22710)
On 06/26/2012 at 2:18am - work - by cmck932012 - United States (Georgia)
Today, I got yelled at and called a pedo by a mother after I sat down in a swing next to her daughter. I was too embarrassed to tell her that I'm a 20 year old who really does enjoy swinging in my spare time. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17595) - you deserved it (2863)
On 05/27/2012 at 9:13am - misc - by CA19oo - United States (Georgia)
Today, I ran for editor-in-chief of a magazine. I spent hours working on my speech, and offered a bunch of new ideas to increase readership. My opponent just said that she, "loved the organization". I lost by a 4-1 margin. My opponent later announced her plans for next year. They were all of my ideas. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21955) - you deserved it (1315)
On 05/10/2012 at 11:45am - misc - by PollingLow (man) - United States (Georgia)
Today, while driving home after the legal curfew, I narrowly avoided a police roadblock and backtracked a mile to drive home another way. I then ran out of gas a mile away from my house. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5996) - you deserved it (17284)
On 04/21/2012 at 1:12am - misc - by ugh (woman) - United States (Georgia)
Today, my girlfriend dragged me along to one of her family's paintball matches. Her father is a former marine, and hates my guts. He kept going well out of his way to hunt me down and pump as many rounds into me as possible without causing a scene. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20398) - you deserved it (2987)
On 04/20/2012 at 10:48pm - love - by fuck (man) - United States (Georgia)
Today, my future mother-in-law told me she thought I was severely allergic to cigarette smoke. That hasn't stopped her from chain-smoking around me for the last 3 years. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14520) - you deserved it (1117)
On 04/10/2012 at 11:49pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Georgia)
Today, I took a pregnancy test. I waited the longest two minutes of my life just to realize I missed the stick. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6690) - you deserved it (16556)
On 04/05/2012 at 3:01pm - misc - by darkestbarbie - United States (Georgia)
Today, I started my brand new job. I was late because while repairing my favorite pair of high heels, I got superglue in my eye. They had to scrape my cornea and I have to wear an eye patch. I'm now the "new pirate" in the office. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9573) - you deserved it (14041)
On 04/04/2012 at 9:41pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (Georgia)
Today, I found out what it feels like to get hit in the head with a bat. Not the wooden kind though. The one that bites and claws you when it gets stuck in your hair. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17943) - you deserved it (1145)
On 03/19/2012 at 9:03pm - animals - by CA19oo - United States (Georgia)
Today, I called pizza hut to order a pizza. A voice recording was reading me their specials. The man had a horrible country accent so I began to make fun of it. Then I realized it was an actual person on the line. FML
I agree, your life sucks (4290) - you deserved it (29581)
On 03/15/2012 at 5:45am - misc - by muzikmaler91 - United States (Georgia)
Today, I met my girlfriend's parents. Her huge, ex-Marine father took me out back, saying he wanted to show me something. That something was a machete. He savagely buried it in a tree stump and said, "Son, if you break my daughter's heart, that'll be your dick." FML
I agree, your life sucks (25495) - you deserved it (4297)
On 03/14/2012 at 9:06pm - intimacy - by PUA - United States (Georgia)
Today, I was posing in front of the mirror, when I realized that everyone who looks at me can easily tell which arm I use to masturbate. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6921) - you deserved it (21287)
On 02/24/2012 at 2:18pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Georgia)
Today, I tried to impress my wife by doing a bunch of push-ups, despite having a bad shoulder. She told me my form sucks and that I'm an idiot. Now I can barely move my arm and I'm going to have to get it fixed. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6421) - you deserved it (19325)
On 02/20/2012 at 12:36pm - love - by WTA (man) - United States (Georgia)
Monday 20 May 2013
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