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FMLs submitted from Georgia

Today, I realized my friends and I should be more careful what we say around my younger brother. I never thought he was paying attention until today. My stepmom told him it was time to go to bed. He responded, "I think it's time for you to suck one." My brother is 4. FML

#615927
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15966) - you deserved it (70465)

On 03/26/2009 at 12:42am - misc - by Alex (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I had an elaborate plan to ask this girl to Prom, and it was going to take a few minutes to set up. I asked my friend to distract her. He decided to distract her by asking her to Prom. She said "Yes". FML

#574471
263 comments

I agree, your life sucks (247773) - you deserved it (41954)

On 03/24/2009 at 11:41am - love - by Kaeyne (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I was with a group of friends at a bar, and we were all talking about whether we were moaners, screamers, or quiet during sex. My boyfriend said that he was a moaner, which I contradicted. Completely straightfaced, he said, "Well, I am when it's good." FML

#518430
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (68046) - you deserved it (22559)

On 03/21/2009 at 9:16pm - intimacy - by AGluckily (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I was enjoying my last day of Spring Break in Panama City. I got up to dance on the stage at the Holiday Inn in front of hundreds of college kids. I tried to be sexy by turning around and bending over. My friends took pictures and my bloody tampon string was hanging out the whole time. FML

#470055
286 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33400) - you deserved it (87825)

On 03/19/2009 at 5:10pm - intimacy - by LindseyS (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I was nude modeling for the first time for a life art class. The only criteria for the class was that I not move at all while being observed. After a few seconds I noticed a really hot girl drawing me. I got a hard on. FML

#442796
243 comments

I agree, your life sucks (75368) - you deserved it (27807)

On 03/18/2009 at 4:37pm - intimacy - by Opplyst11 - United States (Georgia)

Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend when she started moaning and breathing heavily. I thought she was getting hot and was about to cum. Unfortunetly, she soon said, "I'm bored, let's play a board game." She was sighing, not moaning. FML

#412334
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (62940) - you deserved it (21369)

On 03/17/2009 at 1:42pm - intimacy - by ThePopeMan (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I was sitting in math class when I glanced over to the other side of the room and the hottest girl in the school is over there. I could see her thong so I instantly got a boner. About a minute later my teacher calls me up to the board to do a problem. I wore basketball shorts that day. FML

#333787
215 comments

I agree, your life sucks (76181) - you deserved it (39407)

On 03/15/2009 at 12:45am - intimacy - by 12incher (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, my best friend set me up on a blind date with someone he said was very hot. I'm not exactly what you call fit, so I haven't been dating lately. As soon as I got to the restaurant, I spotted the girl. She looked me up and down, said, "You have GOT to be kidding me" and left. FML

#290842
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (63971) - you deserved it (6841)

On 03/12/2009 at 8:38pm - love - by tomtomcutiepoof (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I was late to school for the third time this week because my alarm clock didn't go off. I clearly remembered setting it, so I videotaped myself sleeping. It turns out I've been turning off my alarm clock in my sleep. FML

#267818
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53741) - you deserved it (12240)

On 03/11/2009 at 1:33am - misc - by EFFED4LIFE (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I decided to get dressed up for school because it's my birthday. I was heading to class in my heels. Then, I rolled my ankle, fell down the muddy hill, pulled a leg muscle, and scratched up my knees. At least ten people saw it. I was wearing a white skirt. Happy Birthday. FML

#266744
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53816) - you deserved it (13196)

On 03/10/2009 at 11:16pm - misc - by birthdaygirl (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, me and my boyfriend had some crazy rough sex. In the process I ended up with huge bruises and bite marks all over my neck and chest. I'm giving a speech on domestic violence today. FML

#260982
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28275) - you deserved it (85464)

On 03/10/2009 at 2:52pm - intimacy - by Noname (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, a man in my town was arrested for hiding methanphetamine in a hollowed out walking cane and distributing it to the population of his retirement complex. That man was my 58 year old father. FML

#259923
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (69018) - you deserved it (2891)

On 03/10/2009 at 11:01am - misc - by Noname (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, while driving my kids to school, my son said, "Why don't you find another place to live, so we can just live with daddy?" Then my daughter added, "Yeah, 'cause we LOVE Daddy." FML

#182768
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (75910) - you deserved it (7667)

On 03/02/2009 at 12:28pm - kids - by E (woman) - United States (Georgia)



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