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FMLs submitted from Georgia

Today, I had a coffee date. The guy was waiting with coffee to meet me on the patio. I walked up to him, caught my favorite pendant necklace on the table, broke the necklace trying to get it free, and rattled the table so intensely that the guy's coffee spilled all over him. FML

#2959523
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32534) - you deserved it (6617)

On 06/17/2009 at 12:52am - misc - by vintage_vogue (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I let my on-again, off-again boyfriend spend the night. For months we had been fighting about his new flame. After he convinced me that they are no longer an item, we had the most mind-blowing sex then we fell asleep. I awoke to him moaning her name. Followed by pelvic thrusts. FML

#2940444
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23048) - you deserved it (49780)

On 06/16/2009 at 1:39pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Georgia)

Today, my motorcycle was stolen from the 4th level of my “secure” gated parking garage. I strategically park it tightly between my car and a concrete wall to limit theft opportunity. They scratched my car trying to get it out. FML

#2885254
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44134) - you deserved it (3454)

On 06/14/2009 at 1:28pm - misc - by stolenbike (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, a man came up to me at the bus stop. He went into this long story about how his girlfriend is pregnant and they both haven't eaten in days. Trying to be tough and funny I said back, "sounds like you should invest in condoms instead of food." He responded by beating and robbing me. FML

Today, my mom's will was read to the rest of the family. I helped my mom write it a couple years ago, and I was to get funds to pay off school loans. She revised it and put in a note saying I was to get nothing because I was "lazy." The executor read it out loud. FML

#2796619
173 comments

I agree, your life sucks (100104) - you deserved it (10013)

On 06/11/2009 at 7:51am - money - by TSampson (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, my father's company shut down his branch, leaving him without a job. This is followed by a letter from my school's financial aid office, saying I'm not getting a penny because my family's income level is too high. FML

#2737644
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54129) - you deserved it (2653)

On 06/09/2009 at 8:16am - money - by dammit (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I had to find a date for this banquet we did in my town every year. I paid my neighbor 40 bucks an hour to be my date. It was a 4 hour event. Best part: she got drunk and told the whole town I was paying her. FML

#2720571
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16038) - you deserved it (54220)

On 06/08/2009 at 2:44pm - love - by twowords (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I was walking on a path through a park by myself. I glanced at the ground and saw a shadow behind me. Thinking of an attacker, I screamed as loud as I could and began flailing my arms to ward him off. Turns out, it was a jogger. He had to stop due to his uncontrollable laughter. FML

#2649932
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11744) - you deserved it (49548)

On 06/06/2009 at 12:43am - misc - by paranoid (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, my sister asked me to help her set up for my niece's birthday party. Being the lazy person that I am, I got my niece to blow up the non-helium balloons. Apparently she's allergic to latex and I'll be the one paying for the hospital bill. FML

#2573344
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13062) - you deserved it (53306)

On 06/03/2009 at 5:48pm - misc - by ivyleaguebabe (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, the girl I like came over to my house to watch a movie. We had seen pretty much every movie that I suggested, so we ended up watching The Lion King. I forgot how sad that movie is, because once Mufasa died I started bawling my eyes out. FML

#2456065
290 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38655) - you deserved it (23324)

On 05/31/2009 at 2:46am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I bought a top with some other things. I went to the restroom and had diarrhea, but there was no toilet paper in the stall. I had to use the receipt from the store. I then realized the clerk hadn't put the top in the bag. I needed that receipt to get the top. FML

#2396046
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43347) - you deserved it (13030)

On 05/29/2009 at 1:44am - misc - by suckerrrrr (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I was lighting fireworks for my cousin's birthday in my Grandmother's yard. When it came time to light the "Grand Finale", I read on the outside of the box,"Face this side toward crowd for best result". After I lit it, I realized that it was on it's side. I shot 100 fireworks at my family. FML

#2252019
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11294) - you deserved it (53255)

On 05/24/2009 at 7:52pm - misc - by Tyler_Padgett (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I was taking a final exam and I reached into my pocket to get out a pencil. I felt this thing in my pocket so I got it out and put it on the desk. At first I thought it was a leaf but then it started kicking and trying to run around. It was a cockroach. It had been living in my pocket. FML

#2135843
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46645) - you deserved it (8123)

On 05/21/2009 at 1:36am - misc - by GrahamCracker (man) - United States (Georgia)



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