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FMLs submitted from Georgia

Today, my mom's will was read to the rest of the family. I helped my mom write it a couple years ago, and I was to get funds to pay off school loans. She revised it and put in a note saying I was to get nothing because I was "lazy." The executor read it out loud. FML

#2796619
173 comments

I agree, your life sucks (99847) - you deserved it (9988)

On 06/11/2009 at 7:51am - money - by TSampson (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, my father's company shut down his branch, leaving him without a job. This is followed by a letter from my school's financial aid office, saying I'm not getting a penny because my family's income level is too high. FML

#2737644
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54048) - you deserved it (2645)

On 06/09/2009 at 8:16am - money - by dammit (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I had to find a date for this banquet we did in my town every year. I paid my neighbor 40 bucks an hour to be my date. It was a 4 hour event. Best part: she got drunk and told the whole town I was paying her. FML

#2720571
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16009) - you deserved it (54169)

On 06/08/2009 at 2:44pm - love - by twowords (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I was walking on a path through a park by myself. I glanced at the ground and saw a shadow behind me. Thinking of an attacker, I screamed as loud as I could and began flailing my arms to ward him off. Turns out, it was a jogger. He had to stop due to his uncontrollable laughter. FML

#2649932
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11710) - you deserved it (49487)

On 06/06/2009 at 12:43am - misc - by paranoid (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, my sister asked me to help her set up for my niece's birthday party. Being the lazy person that I am, I got my niece to blow up the non-helium balloons. Apparently she's allergic to latex and I'll be the one paying for the hospital bill. FML

#2573344
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13028) - you deserved it (53201)

On 06/03/2009 at 5:48pm - misc - by ivyleaguebabe (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, the girl I like came over to my house to watch a movie. We had seen pretty much every movie that I suggested, so we ended up watching The Lion King. I forgot how sad that movie is, because once Mufasa died I started bawling my eyes out. FML

#2456065
290 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38570) - you deserved it (23306)

On 05/31/2009 at 2:46am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I bought a top with some other things. I went to the restroom and had diarrhea, but there was no toilet paper in the stall. I had to use the receipt from the store. I then realized the clerk hadn't put the top in the bag. I needed that receipt to get the top. FML

#2396046
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43276) - you deserved it (13020)

On 05/29/2009 at 1:44am - misc - by suckerrrrr (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I was lighting fireworks for my cousin's birthday in my Grandmother's yard. When it came time to light the "Grand Finale", I read on the outside of the box,"Face this side toward crowd for best result". After I lit it, I realized that it was on it's side. I shot 100 fireworks at my family. FML

#2252019
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11263) - you deserved it (53198)

On 05/24/2009 at 7:52pm - misc - by Tyler_Padgett (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I was taking a final exam and I reached into my pocket to get out a pencil. I felt this thing in my pocket so I got it out and put it on the desk. At first I thought it was a leaf but then it started kicking and trying to run around. It was a cockroach. It had been living in my pocket. FML

#2135843
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46566) - you deserved it (8119)

On 05/21/2009 at 1:36am - misc - by GrahamCracker (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, my brother came out to our family as being gay. My mother starting crying because "She wanted grandchildren." I told her that I was planning on having children. She started crying harder. FML

#2095201
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (66350) - you deserved it (3773)

On 05/19/2009 at 9:21pm - kids - by bopbop (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, my husband let me sleep in while he worked on the landscaping by our backyard pool. Ready for a shower, I stripped naked, opened the back door to let the dog out, and stepped out to ask him how it was going. Turns out he'd finally hired a landscaping crew. FML

#2082819
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40715) - you deserved it (25461)

On 05/19/2009 at 4:13pm - animals - by Deconstructed (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I was driving in my very own car that I bought and paid for myself, when I stopped at a stop light. Then I noticed the truck in front of me turn on his reverse lights. I honked desperately. He hits me, looks out the window and says "I see no damage" and drives away. FML

#2072486
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55795) - you deserved it (3208)

On 05/19/2009 at 2:19am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, my dog started to hump my leg. He always does this and I heard that humping the dog back asserted dominance. Well, I decided to, and I dry humped him back. As I was doing this I said "How do you like that!" And then my mom walked in. FML

#2026481
436 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31907) - you deserved it (141187)

On 05/17/2009 at 7:40pm - animals - by sucks (man) - United States (Georgia)



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