FMLs submitted from Georgia

Today, after working incredibly hard to get into college without having to take out loans, classes started. I was told we'll need a $200 piece of software, and we'll fail without it. There's no way I can afford it. FML

by NotCollegeBound / 08/20/2015 at 3:21am / United States (Georgia) / Miscellaneous

Today, while out jogging, I was suddenly hit with unbelievable gastric distress. I wasn't wearing brown pants when I set out on that jog, but I sure was when I made it back home. FML

by hbt51 / 08/17/2015 at 3:56pm / United States (Georgia) / Miscellaneous

Today, my grandma and I went shopping. When I picked up some shower gel, she started ranting in front of everyone that shower gel injures one's "lady parts" and causes infertility, and that she wants me to give her great-grandchildren. FML

by for fuck's sake, gran / 07/25/2015 at 1:30am / United States (Georgia) / Miscellaneous

Today, a customer complained he never got his sandwich, even though I put it in the oven, dressed it up and served it to him. When I went to clear his table off, I saw the sandwich basket. We had to give him his money back. FML

by okay / 07/22/2015 at 12:58am / United States (Georgia) / Kids

Today, my best friend told me he masturbates to my Instagram page. Thanks, I guess. FML

by battle1 / 07/17/2015 at 7:00am / United States (Georgia) / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend introduced me to his friends as his "sex partner." FML

by Partners / 06/22/2015 at 3:55pm / United States (Georgia) / Love

Today, my girlfriend randomly confessed to basically having a "phobia" of monogamy. But don't worry, she defensively assured me she's never ever cheated on me, even though I never said she had, so I guess that's okay then. FML

by well then / 05/30/2015 at 1:40am / United States (Georgia) / Love

Today, my neighbor's dog decided to knock over our trash cans, which were full of my bathroom trash. I had to pick up tampon and maxi pad wrappers from all over the neighborhood. FML

by A / 05/22/2015 at 11:25pm / United States (Georgia) / Miscellaneous

Today, my best friend can now say "I fucked your mom" to me and actually mean it. FML

by Anonymous / 04/22/2015 at 10:14am / United States (Georgia) / Intimacy

Today, I ran into the woman who hit my car and drove off three days ago. She was my bank teller. I called 911; she pressed the silent alarm. Guess whose story the cops believed. FML

by yupthissucks / 04/13/2015 at 5:00am / United States (Georgia) / Transportation

Today, I stopped to replace a stuffed bear that had fallen from a small memorial for a girl killed nearby. Her mom happened to walk by and thought I was stealing it. She hit me with her purse. FML

by ouch / 04/06/2015 at 9:51pm / United States (Georgia) / Miscellaneous

Today, I managed to take an entire shower without realizing my socks were on. I washed my feet. FML

by comfort_ / 03/26/2015 at 11:28pm / United States (Georgia) / Miscellaneous

Today, I went out with two friends for lunch. The van we took ran out of fuel, so we pushed it to a nearby gas station, a gas station suffering from a gas shortage. FML

by van no gough / 03/21/2015 at 8:07pm / United States (Georgia) / Miscellaneous