FMLs submitted from Georgia

Today, I shaved my head because I heard that one of my good friends got cancer. I went to visit her in the hospital. She's not bald. FML

by nohair / 04/24/2011 at 10:06am / United States (Georgia) / Health

Today, I tried to spice things up in the bedroom by making love to my husband in a tight leather corset. I ended up passing out. FML

by purrykitty / 04/23/2011 at 4:18pm / United States (Georgia) / Intimacy

Today, I discovered that not only is my live-in mother-in-law a fan of Lady Gaga, she dances around the house naked to fully embrace the music. FML

by Anonymous / 04/08/2011 at 12:25pm / United States (Georgia) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was walking along when I saw this girl kissing her boyfriend. I thought to myself "I wish I had a boyfriend like that". I'm a guy, and straight. At least I thought I was. FML

by Anonymous / 04/07/2011 at 11:15am / United States (Georgia) / Love

Today, I learned that my parents' nickname for my fiancé is "dickwad." FML

by why / 04/05/2011 at 11:25am / United States (Georgia) / Miscellaneous

Today, I am taking a 16 hour flight. Five minutes in, the lady on one side has clipped her toenails onto me and the guy on the other side has the most horrific gas I have ever smelled. To help this problem he bought a cheese plate from the stewardess. 15 hours and 55 minutes to go. FML

by Anonymous / 03/21/2011 at 2:36pm / United States (Georgia) / Transportation

Today, I learned why my credit score is so low. My mom stole my identity almost three years ago. Her excuse? "You didn't need good credit for anything anyways". FML

by MommyLovesMe / 03/08/2011 at 10:21am / United States (Georgia) / Money

Today, I went to a rave where apparently one of my favorite rappers was supposed to perform. I stood in line for 2 hours in the rain, got pushed and shoved, and had to witness a bunch of drunken idiots puke all over the place. Once I finally got to the front of the line, they closed the doors. FML

by bullllllshittttt / 03/06/2011 at 2:25am / United States (Georgia) / Miscellaneous

Today, my girlfriend went down on me for the first time. Just as I was reaching climax my brother raced into the bathroom right next to my door and began to vomit extremely loudly. FML

by Anonymous / 03/05/2011 at 12:05am / United States (Georgia) / Intimacy

Today, my parents told me that due to my lacking height and weight, I legally have to sit in a booster seat in the car from now on. I'm nineteen. FML

by Anonymous / 03/03/2011 at 6:18pm / United States (Georgia) / Miscellaneous

Today, a guy who I have known for a long time confessed his love to me. It would have been sweet except that he will become my stepbrother in 3 days. FML

by welcometothefamily / 02/26/2011 at 9:03am / United States (Georgia) / Love

Today, the only person to wish me a Happy Valentine's day was a wrong number calling my cell phone. FML

by moe / 02/14/2011 at 10:07pm / United States (Georgia) / Love

Today, I saw an attractive, thin woman eating a salad. Trying to be smooth, I approached her and told her that she didn't need to eat so scarcely, because she was beautiful. She promptly gave me a dirty look and informed me that she was a vegetarian. FML

by Anonymous / 02/08/2011 at 1:32pm / United States (Georgia) / Miscellaneous