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FMLs submitted from Georgia

Today, I was posing in front of the mirror, when I realized that everyone who looks at me can easily tell which arm I use to masturbate. FML

#19154069
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10410) - you deserved it (35087)

On 02/24/2012 at 2:18pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I tried to impress my wife by doing a bunch of push-ups, despite having a bad shoulder. She told me my form sucks and that I'm an idiot. Now I can barely move my arm and I'm going to have to get it fixed. FML

#19122555
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9018) - you deserved it (30550)

On 02/20/2012 at 12:36pm - love - by WTA (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I received a cute letter in my locker. It was in German, so I used Google translate. Apparently, someone hopes I choke on big fat cock. FML

#19078471
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28523) - you deserved it (3058)

On 02/14/2012 at 7:35pm - intimacy - by kittens go meow - United States (Georgia)

Today, my boyfriend of three months told me he's going to get tested for STDs, because he's worried about a previous partner. I'm grateful for his thoughtfulness, but I'd be even more grateful if we hadn't already slept together several times. FML

#19036366
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25315) - you deserved it (6492)

On 02/09/2012 at 7:09pm - intimacy - by nosymptoms (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I went to my first party, hoping to maybe meet some people. I was there for 4 hours, and the person/thing that I interacted most with was a cat. FML

#19009363
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21953) - you deserved it (6444)

On 02/06/2012 at 10:32am - misc - by haileypaige123 (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, my boyfriend shared with me his anxiety about death, so I shared with him one of my ridiculously irrational fears. He thought I was making fun of him and now won't talk to me. FML

#18831926
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24657) - you deserved it (5202)

On 01/17/2012 at 1:43am - love - by Anonymous - United States (Georgia)

Today, I realized my self confidence is based on the amount of "likes" I have on my Facebook statuses. FML

#18823923
181 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14275) - you deserved it (33554)

On 01/16/2012 at 11:10am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Georgia)

Today, my roommate finally cleaned her cat's very full litter box. I later found our only good spatula crusted with kitty feces, which she'd left on the kitchen counter for me to find. FML

#18772974
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24940) - you deserved it (2046)

On 01/11/2012 at 2:47am - animals - by GrossedOut (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, my boyfriend texted me saying he had left a surprise on my driveway. Thinking it was something special, I went outside to look. It was a little bag of mayonnaise packets. FML

#18750908
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25204) - you deserved it (3668)

On 01/08/2012 at 9:41pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, my girlfriend told me there was good news and bad news. Bad news: she's pregnant. Good news: I'm probably not the father. FML

#18728659
213 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48514) - you deserved it (4003)

On 01/06/2012 at 7:01pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Georgia)

Today, it's New Year's Eve. My husband and I weren't invited to any parties, and we don't have a sitter to be able to go out by ourselves. Instead, I'm watching "Beverly Hills Chihuahua 2" on the Disney channel with our 5-year-old, and my husband has passed out on the couch from sheer boredom. FML

#18667282
42 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24974) - you deserved it (6899)

On 12/31/2011 at 8:22pm - misc - by Livewire (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, while shopping at Wal-Mart, a guy grabbed my butt. When I turned around to slap him, he shook his head, said "Nice ass but such an ugly face", then walked away. I've never been told I'm ugly before. FML

#18667019
205 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31616) - you deserved it (7653)

On 12/31/2011 at 7:51pm - misc - by thathurt (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, after spending months learning how to play the guitar and memorizing the music to my girlfriend's all-time favorite song, I performed it for her. Her response? "Well, you kind of ruined that song for me now." FML

#18563355
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31637) - you deserved it (5091)

On 12/20/2011 at 5:41pm - love - by tommy - United States (Georgia)



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