Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

FMLs submitted from Georgia

Today, while using a public toilet, a guy started pissing beside me at the urinal. The breach of bathroom etiquette then escalated to him taking a long look down at me and saying "Nice sack, dude." followed by him finishing up and leaving without even washing his hands. FML

#21302695
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29175) - you deserved it (2264)

On 11/20/2014 at 11:35am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I got home and found my wife cuddling with the dog and our new kitten. Both the cat and my wife hissed at me when I tried to join in. FML

#21298618
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31585) - you deserved it (3475)

On 11/13/2014 at 9:14pm - animals - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, one of the patients on the mental health unit where I work looked me up and down and said; "Well, I guess it's a popular misconception that all fat people are jolly." FML

#21298006
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29150) - you deserved it (3969)

On 11/12/2014 at 9:48pm - work - by thefatnurse - United States (Georgia)

Today, after nearly two weeks of being stressed out due to financial issues, I decided to spend my last 4 dollars on stress-relieving body wash. Apparently this particular body wash causes me to break out in hives and now I have no money for rash cream. FML

#21296921
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35036) - you deserved it (6060)

On 11/11/2014 at 12:43pm - money - by killme - United States (Georgia)

Today, as a restaurant manager, I had a large party of difficult guests. They sat in their private room they'd reserved for three-and-a-half hours, then caused a huge scene when it was time to pay. One guy even ran at me like he was going to hit me. FML

#21276013
38 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32459) - you deserved it (2248)

On 10/12/2014 at 2:40am - work - by stressed - United States (Georgia)

Today, a day after being informed that keeping my wallet in my front pocket was "strange", my wallet was stolen from my back pocket. FML

Today, my daughter's teacher called me, very concerned, because my child told the whole class she's not virgin anymore. The word is "vegan", honey. FML

#21253313
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38922) - you deserved it (3418)

On 09/06/2014 at 9:57pm - kids - by healthfreak - United States (Georgia)

Today, I found out that my girlfriend takes videos of me sleeping and watches them with her friends. FML

#21250632
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35743) - you deserved it (3207)

On 09/02/2014 at 5:29pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Georgia)

Today, it's the 16th day of my period. FML

Today, I should be spending my birthday with my boyfriend of 8 months. Instead he's visiting his ex, who's pregnant with a baby that "may or may not be" his. FML.

#21228356
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43942) - you deserved it (5815)

On 08/03/2014 at 11:13am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, upon arriving at a town festival, I was immediately singled out by a rent-a-cop. He began questioning if I had been drinking, saying he smelt it on my breath. He smelt his own breath. FML

#21227846
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35699) - you deserved it (2552)

On 08/02/2014 at 7:44pm - misc - by porkabye (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I accidentally farted in the middle of class. Thinking I got away with it, I just kept doing my work until some kid across the room says, "I could have done better." FML

#21224311
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35515) - you deserved it (6333)

On 07/29/2014 at 11:49pm - work - by dealtit - United States (Georgia)

Today, I went to a bookstore to get "The Grapes of Wrath". I have a problem with controlling the volume of my voice, so once at the counter, I accidentally said quite loudly, "WHERE ARE THE ANGRY GRAPES?" FML

#21217858
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35180) - you deserved it (11509)

On 07/22/2014 at 11:36pm - misc - by Face fucking palm - United States (Georgia)



FML's blog

  • Malec's illustrated FML
  • Life is like a box of chocolate full of piece of rabbit droppings sometimes, isn't it? OK, I'll admit that's a weird way to start an article a few days before Christmas. Let me explain: you try and get…

Friday 12 December 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: