Today, my son told me to grow a pair and ask my girlfriend of a year and a half to marry me. He is 7 years old. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5310) - you totally deserved it (14561)
On 11/17/2009 at 5:58pm - kids - by unsuspcted (man) - United States (Georgia)
Today, my boyfriend decided to be romantic and literally sweep me off my feet... directly into a door frame. Now my face is bruised, and the police officer at my school has asked me if I need to make a report about anything. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11933) - you totally deserved it (818)
On 11/16/2009 at 8:54pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Georgia)
Today, my husband and I put our 9 month old twins to bed and went outside to enjoy a very rare few minutes with each other, a couple of beers, with a baby monitor. He shut the sliding glass door, and I watched the bar that locks it accidentally slide into locked position. All the other doors were locked. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14630) - you totally deserved it (4149)
On 11/16/2009 at 3:10pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Georgia)
Today, I sat right next to the door on the bus. When I went to get up, a man tripped and pushed me down the exit door stairs. I fell down and legitimately broke my ankle. While tending to my ankle, the bus doors closed and my backpack with my laptop, notes and calculator drove away. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19055) - you totally deserved it (670)
On 11/12/2009 at 9:43pm - money - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Georgia)
Today, I woke up next to the girl I had drunk intercourse with last night. Before we got it on, I noticed a package of birth control pills on her nightstand. Because of this, I felt no need to use a condom, or pull out. When I woke up, I noticed those "pills" were actually a makeup case. FML
I agree, your life sucks (1167) - you totally deserved it (10626)
On 11/10/2009 at 8:52pm - intimacy - by prayforme (man) - United States (Georgia)
Today, I got wasted at a party and went out to my car to get something. I went back to the house and realized I got locked out. After knocking on the door, ringing the doorbell, and shouting "LET ME INNNN" my friend called and asked where I was. That's when I realized I was at the wrong house. FML
I agree, your life sucks (2621) - you totally deserved it (17433)
On 11/10/2009 at 7:10pm - misc - by Abby (woman) - United States (Georgia)
Today, my boyfriend of 7 years broke up with me in a text message. Then I found out from a mutual friend that he "came out" and told everyone at our school that he is gay. He has known he was gay for years and he was just using me as a cover up. What a great way to start my senior year. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19341) - you totally deserved it (2260)
On 11/09/2009 at 11:02pm - love - by amanda_ae_erin (woman) - United States (Georgia)
Today, I was driving past men working on the side of the road. There was a lot of water pouring down the road and as I slowed down to drive through it, a car sped past me, splashing my entire car. It was only then I realized it was a septic tank leak. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16178) - you totally deserved it (964)
On 11/03/2009 at 2:26am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Georgia)
Today, I went on a date, and within the first five minutes, he said, "Before we go any further and get anymore serious, you need to know a few things, I have kissed a guy drunk because it was a dare, and have a $400 silk rose Victoria's Secret blanket." FML
I agree, your life sucks (15750) - you totally deserved it (2836)
On 11/02/2009 at 10:41pm - misc - by Shawty (woman) - United States (Georgia)
Today, I finally had the opportunity to have sex with my girlfriend. This would be the first time for both of us, so I tried to make it really special. I had everything planned out to be very romantic. She loved how it was set up. After all this, I couldn't get it up at all, all night. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5892) - you totally deserved it (1319)
On 11/02/2009 at 9:04am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Georgia)
Today, I went running for the first time in a few months. I had what I thought was an asthma attack. When I got home, I realized that it was not asthma, but instead I have gained so much weight that my running bra restricted my breathing. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6036) - you totally deserved it (14762)
On 10/29/2009 at 12:07am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Georgia)
Today, I noticed a spot of water on the floor. I thought my cats had spilled a cup of water and didn't worry about it. I went to a meeting and when I came back, my entire apartment was flooded with 3 inches of water. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18646) - you totally deserved it (3452)
On 10/28/2009 at 11:57am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Georgia)
Today, I threw a paper ball into a recycling bin backwards. I don't know whats more sad: the fact that that was my highlight of my life, or I had been attempting to make that shot every day for 3 years. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15739) - you totally deserved it (3799)
On 10/23/2009 at 12:47am - misc - by efmylife (man) - United States (Georgia)
