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  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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FMLs submitted from Florida

Today, I was outside when a mouse ran toward my feet. There was a wall behind me, so I tried to jump over him. He changed course, and I landed on him. It crunched. FML

#11940720
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32412) - you deserved it (7363)

On 07/17/2010 at 10:54am - misc - by killer (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I took some new allergy medicine I had never tried before, and I didn't bother reading the side effects. I then went to school. It was almost an hour before dismissal when I had felt a warm feeling on my legs. One of the side effects to my new medicine was bladder control problems. FML

#11906376
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18632) - you deserved it (23586)

On 07/15/2010 at 8:17pm - misc - by darthinvader (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I was on webcam for the first time with a guy I've been texting for a while. Trying to show off my guitar skills, I lean down to pick it up and fell on my face. FML

#11894871
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12130) - you deserved it (24359)

On 07/15/2010 at 5:17am - misc - by ditsy (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, my new step-dad proposed to my mom during a family trip to Wal-Mart. FML

#11251365
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36995) - you deserved it (3810)

On 06/16/2010 at 10:22pm - misc - by Blank (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, after spending the evening with friends, I went home and realized that the living room light was on. Thinking someone was robbing me, I hid behind a bush. I got impatient and crept up to the door. Then I remembered that I'd left the light on before I left. FML

#11166091
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7249) - you deserved it (42811)

On 06/13/2010 at 9:16am - misc - by jonjon (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I logged onto Facebook and found out that my own mother unfriended me because she didn't want her new boyfriend to know that she had a daughter. FML

#11001063
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37490) - you deserved it (2612)

On 06/06/2010 at 1:23am - misc - by justdancebbyx3 (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I was making out with my boyfriend. It was going well until our braces got caught. Out of pain, I tried to pull away, which made my eyes water. Then I sneezed in his mouth. FML

#10832830
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34470) - you deserved it (7527)

On 05/29/2010 at 12:14am - health - by fmlpanda (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, after doing a graveyard shift at work, I took the bus home. I fell asleep on the way and woke up 25 miles away from my bus stop. I took another bus heading back and couldn't stay awake. I then woke up where I started from. FML

#10707019
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28920) - you deserved it (12400)

On 05/23/2010 at 3:29am - work - by Around - United States (Florida)

Today, my boyfriend gave me a pair of ankle weights for my birthday. How utterly romantic. FML

#10656263
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21694) - you deserved it (4631)

On 05/20/2010 at 8:54pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I stopped at a yellow light. The guy behind me did not. He had no insurance. FML

#10549258
217 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33429) - you deserved it (6410)

On 05/15/2010 at 3:41pm - money - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, as I was pulling out of the school parking lot I was blasting my music and feeling pretty awesome, I got a few honks and felt even cooler. Until some lady pulled up next to me and told me I had left my binder on the roof and all my papers were all over the road behind me. FML

#9138869
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7314) - you deserved it (38234)

On 03/16/2010 at 7:03pm - misc - by Midge (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I woke up to go pee and my cat followed me into the bathroom as usual. Then, in a not so usual fashion, she tried to jump from the sink to the top of the toilet, missed, and fell into the bowl while I was peeing. I'm scratched in a bad place, I have urine to clean up off the bathroom floor, and a traumatized cat. FML

#9135717
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32808) - you deserved it (4691)

On 03/16/2010 at 4:51pm - animals - by Adam (man) - United States (Florida)



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