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FMLs submitted from Florida

Today, I came home to find that my mother had sold all my valuable collector coins for cheap at a local shady pawn shop to buy herself a TV. The coins in question were worth enough to start a business. FML

#18706154
226 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41356) - you deserved it (2610)

On 01/04/2012 at 1:30pm - money - by Ilostsomuch (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I was pushed over and robbed in a parking lot by a man in an ugly Christmas sweater. When I looked up, I was too distracted by the sweater to even look at his face. FML

#18681564
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26487) - you deserved it (7828)

On 01/02/2012 at 12:40am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, I received a late Christmas present from my estranged father. I was really excited, having neither seen nor heard from him in nearly two years. It was a $200 gift card for a store that only exists in Canada. I don't live in Canada. Not even close. FML

#18675762
367 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27288) - you deserved it (3622)

On 01/01/2012 at 3:06pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, I have to choose between getting a cellphone contract that I need, or a TV that I don't even want, but which my flatmates insist I contribute towards. The same flatmates who eat all my food. This increased grocery bill has left me unable to afford either the phone or TV. FML

#18650592
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23848) - you deserved it (5848)

On 12/30/2011 at 2:10am - money - by WTF - United States (Florida)

Today, my mom asked me to help pick out clothes for my grandma to wear in her casket. I didn't know she'd died. FML

#18646853
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32449) - you deserved it (2681)

On 12/29/2011 at 7:29pm - misc - by naomids (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I walked into my elderly grandmother's trailer, used the bathroom and went to wash my hands. She had a soft spot in the floor that she covered with a bathmat. I fell through. Right leg up to my hip in the floor, boobs stuck on the counter. My husband and grandmother stood there laughing. FML

#18624537
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23803) - you deserved it (2681)

On 12/27/2011 at 12:13pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I spent the day crying, and ate McDonald's for my Christmas dinner. FML

#18613200
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40697) - you deserved it (5075)

On 12/26/2011 at 1:33am - misc - by Holly Jolly (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I overheard my mom telling my younger sister not to use my razors because she "doesn't know what I may have." FML

#18604441
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24917) - you deserved it (4425)

On 12/25/2011 at 2:28am - health - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, my husband left his laptop logged in to a chat site after leaving for work. Curious, I read some of the logs, and discovered he has been posing as a woman and holding filthy conversations with "hot teen lesbians" for the past several months. FML

#18599933
270 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44229) - you deserved it (5649)

On 12/24/2011 at 4:50pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I realized my wife often switches the TV channel from the crime dramas we both like, to Hollywood gossip shows that I can't stand, just to get me to leave the room. From the other room, I can see that she switches back once I've left. She's probably been doing this for years. FML

#18592801
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28595) - you deserved it (3150)

On 12/23/2011 at 9:24pm - love - by unwanted (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, a guy tried to seduce me by talking about incest. FML

#18586179
214 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30760) - you deserved it (3196)

On 12/23/2011 at 2:42am - intimacy - by balkangirl94 - United States (Florida)

Today, after a long therapy session, in which I poured out all my feelings of how happy and in love I am with whom I believe to be my soul-mate, my shrink asked me if I was sure this guy wasn't a figment of my imagination. FML

#18576133
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25085) - you deserved it (3190)

On 12/22/2011 at 12:50am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I grabbed some lotion to have a good old wank. However, I'd got it a bit wrong in my rush to spurt my man-mush into an old gym sock, and had picked up some concentrated bronzer. I now have neon-orange hands and genitals. FML

#18556841
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8922) - you deserved it (44785)

On 12/19/2011 at 9:29pm - intimacy - by Colton (man) - United States (Florida)



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