Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

FMLs submitted from Florida

Today, due to "severe cuts to the budget" at work, I had to stir my coffee with a paper clip. FML

#18402392
37 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23211) - you deserved it (4870)

On 12/01/2011 at 9:38am - work - by ohno - United States (Florida)

Today, after recently moving to America as I've always dreamt of, I saw my first, majestic deer. My boyfriend slammed it with the rental car. FML

#18400487
201 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26618) - you deserved it (3310)

On 12/01/2011 at 12:41am - misc - by AmericanDream (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, after working for over ten years at a dead-end factory line, I told my friends I was going to take some business courses and land myself a real job. All they've done since is laugh, mock me, and say that if Clinton couldn't fix the economy, I have no chance. FML

#18350562
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20439) - you deserved it (2557)

On 11/25/2011 at 8:37pm - work - by workworkwork - United States (Florida)

Today, I was complaining to my boyfriend about our excessive water bill. He then says, "Don't look at me, I don't even shower." FML

#18325546
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26943) - you deserved it (5392)

On 11/23/2011 at 10:16am - money - by jshibbz0993 - United States (Florida)

Today, I was so hungry that I literally stole candy from a baby. FML

#18306408
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9467) - you deserved it (40589)

On 11/21/2011 at 9:34am - health - by bad karma (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, my 11 year old sister deleted me off Facebook because I'm not "cool enough" to be seen on her profile. FML

#18302175
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26410) - you deserved it (5018)

On 11/20/2011 at 9:21pm - kids - by sourcandy013 - United States (Florida)

Today, I was involved in a car accident and hit my head on the dash. I now have huge, very sore knot on my head. My boyfriend now takes every opportunity to poke it and scream "Look! A baby unicorn!" FML

#18280377
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28971) - you deserved it (3743)

On 11/18/2011 at 10:26am - misc - by southernpride93 - United States (Florida)

Today, I was doing the reverse cowgirl with my boyfriend. I was on the way to a glorious finish when he pointed out that I had a pimple on my butt. He began to laugh so hard that he went soft. FML

#18271513
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37634) - you deserved it (5483)

On 11/17/2011 at 9:06am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, my landlady cut off the Internet to my flat. She says she has no use for it, and doesn't want to keep it anymore. I have 3 online assignments due in the next week, and finals the following week. FML

#18261463
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27547) - you deserved it (2436)

On 11/16/2011 at 1:32am - work - by nyatzz - United States (Florida)

Today, I had to deliver pizza to a nudist colony. I got an eyeful of more than I needed to see. FML

#18182863
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28585) - you deserved it (3508)

On 11/07/2011 at 9:24am - work - by Dlord357 (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I spent over 20 minutes trying to convince my daughter that the word she was trying to use was "Back-pack" and not "Back-back". I never convinced her. She is 16 years old. FML

Today, I ran into my boyfriend's dad. His exact words were, "Call me when you're ready to feel what a real man can do to you." FML

#18145171
318 comments

I agree, your life sucks (62280) - you deserved it (4615)

On 11/03/2011 at 3:29am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, at work I asked a cute, albeit slightly large customer, her name. Being hard of hearing, I thought she said "Porky" and asked her about it. Turns out she'd said Courtney. FML

#18136317
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24893) - you deserved it (9414)

On 11/02/2011 at 3:12am - work - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)



FML's blog

  • FML on vacation #1: Getting there
  • A lot of people will spout off the tired old cliché that the destination isn't as important as the journey itself. Well, what if you're on your way to the Playboy Mansion then?…

Tuesday 22 July 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: