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FMLs submitted from Florida

Today, I had to bury my horse again because coyotes keep digging it up. FML

#19230527
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39192) - you deserved it (2891)

On 03/06/2012 at 11:03pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, my 8-year-old niece corrected my spelling via text message. FML

#19227628
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7377) - you deserved it (31443)

On 03/06/2012 at 3:41pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I learned that it doesn't matter how good you've screwed a satellite dish onto the side of your house, it won't stop the wind the ripping it off and taking half the wall with it. FML

#19143991
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20345) - you deserved it (2559)

On 02/23/2012 at 2:03am - misc - by Blueshock08 - United States (Florida)

Today, a first date with a guy went so badly that he actually paid me to never call him again. FML

#19137276
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27399) - you deserved it (4795)

On 02/22/2012 at 4:37am - love - by Lonely Gay (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I spent my day creating a new type of laugh, and performing it in my head. FML

#19129747
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15127) - you deserved it (11712)

On 02/21/2012 at 6:49am - work - by annoym - United States (Florida)

Today, I was holding my 3 year old brother, and apparently he thinks it's hilarious to pull my tank top down and scream ''BOOBS!'' in public. FML

#19093688
211 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30255) - you deserved it (4424)

On 02/16/2012 at 2:41pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, I discovered how startling it is to wake up by having your cat springboard off your face. The intended prey? Two fornicating geckos on the ceiling. FML

Today, while I was at work, my boyfriend decided to give my Cocker Spaniel a haircut. I now have the equivalent of an over-sized naked mole rat running around my house. FML

#19083975
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20076) - you deserved it (2525)

On 02/15/2012 at 6:09am - animals - by workaholic (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I got to listen while my grandma, who has dementia and therefore a poor memory, explained to me why the old man on TV was a sex god. She forgot everything once she said it. I got to listen to her explanation five times over. FML

#18942178
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21981) - you deserved it (2144)

On 01/29/2012 at 11:23am - misc - by scared for life (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I was in a Zumba class with a young woman in her 20s and an older woman in her 80s. I couldn't keep up with either one of them. FML

#18934570
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19317) - you deserved it (6003)

On 01/28/2012 at 2:47pm - misc - by Username - United States (Florida)

Today, I went to get my blood drawn to see how far along I am pregnant. The lady stuck both my arms twice and then busted a vein in my right arm. She told me to come back tomorrow to try again. FML

#18875676
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26634) - you deserved it (1901)

On 01/21/2012 at 11:23pm - health - by Boo Boo (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I found out my boyfriend has been cheating on me. In tears, I called my best friend and told him everything. He responded with one- or two-word answers throughout, but I felt better all the same. That is, until I heard him begin to take a loud piss half-way through my sentence. FML

#18865493
197 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24650) - you deserved it (5751)

On 01/20/2012 at 9:31pm - love - by fuckthepopo (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, my boyfriend insisted that we try phone sex. He started telling me all the things he wanted to do to me while breathing heavily. Unfortunately, it sounded so ridiculous, I burst out laughing. He hung up on me, and has refused to pick up since. FML

#18849422
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17494) - you deserved it (31451)

On 01/18/2012 at 11:09pm - intimacy - by Lickmylovepump (woman) - United States (Florida)



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