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FMLs submitted from Florida

Today, I went to have a pre-cancerous mole removed off of my nose. When the doctor numbed my nose, she didn't check to see if the anesthetic actually worked, and began hacking away at my nose, leaving me to feel every last flick of the razor. Turns out I have an immunity to that anesthetic. FML

#21346273
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14271) - you deserved it (1041)

On 01/29/2015 at 4:00pm - health - by ThatWasntFun - United States (Florida)

Today, I was talking to a girl. It was going pretty well until she said, "LOL." What's so bad about that? We weren't texting. FML

#21345280
100 comments

Today, I was asked by a total stranger if I had Tourettes. This is the third time this has happened to me. FML

#21342680
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25001) - you deserved it (4686)

On 01/23/2015 at 2:39am - misc - by Evra (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, at Walmart, a crazy old woman bitched me out for being pregnant. She kept following me around, calling me a stupid teen slut and saying she hoped my baby died so I could live a "normal life". I'm 26 and just very short. FML

#21341527
193 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38552) - you deserved it (2198)

On 01/21/2015 at 9:34am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, my husband bought me XL pajamas for my birthday. I got really angry, telling him that's obviously not my size. I tried them on just to show him how ridiculous they look. They fit. FML

#21336954
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20981) - you deserved it (36373)

On 01/14/2015 at 12:49pm - love - by middleagednurse - United States (Florida)

Today, I was walking with a female friend when suddenly, my ex-girlfriend comes running down the street and says, "So, you're cheating on me with this slut, huh?!" We've been separated for a decade now. FML

#21336664
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35216) - you deserved it (2461)

On 01/13/2015 at 10:05pm - love - by RipeFlame - United States (Florida)

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me. Her reason? Not enough guys have been liking her photos on Instagram since we started dating. FML

#21335495
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33477) - you deserved it (2595)

On 01/12/2015 at 12:03am - love - by yankeeboy123 - United States (Florida)

Today, I asked the girl I sort of like as we were leaving class how her day was going so far. She said, 'Great. Don't ruin it.' FML

#21333389
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29870) - you deserved it (2613)

On 01/08/2015 at 4:26pm - love - by loser - United States (Florida)

Today, a girl from class screamed at me in public for hugging the guy she likes. She threatened to take me out if I didn't "back off". That guy is my boyfriend. FML

#21333251
112 comments

Today, someone tried to break into my dorm room while I was in class. Ramming the metal door with their shoulder just dented it, so they pissed on my welcome mat and left. FML

#21331929
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30209) - you deserved it (2184)

On 01/06/2015 at 9:10am - misc - by rimenrezon (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I woke up with every muscle in my body hurting so bad I could hardly walk. Participation in a triathlon, or overdoing it at the gym? No, the results of a day spent cleaning the house. FML

#21331613
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24991) - you deserved it (5539)

On 01/05/2015 at 9:51pm - health - by FlabbyPants (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, my dad rejected my birthday present to him because it was "Made in China." FML

#21329640
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26727) - you deserved it (4019)

On 01/02/2015 at 10:11pm - misc - by whatajerk (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, my 8-year-old daughter was throwing a tantrum, and I said "Keep this up and I'll tell Santa to take your presents back." She told me I don't even know Santa, at which point I accidentally blurted that I'm "Santa". FML

#21323581
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28741) - you deserved it (11051)

On 12/24/2014 at 10:01pm - kids - by Santa (man) - United States (Florida)



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