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FMLs submitted from Connecticut

Today, I had to stay late at work. My husband made me take a video of myself punching out, to prove I wasn't cheating on him. FML

#18210468
188 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28354) - you deserved it (5524)

On 11/10/2011 at 2:20pm - work - by ToInsecure4me - United States (Connecticut)

Today, my boyfriend's mother told me she bought the same perfume that my boyfriend got me for Christmas last year. He loves that perfume. Now, whenever he smells me, he's going to think of his mom. FML

#18097198
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21563) - you deserved it (2237)

On 10/28/2011 at 4:25pm - love - by Annoyed (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, two Jehovah's Witnesses rang my doorbell for the 10th time. This time they asked me whether I knew Faith's greatest enemy. I replied, "Basic reasoning?" A copy of The Watchtower can really hurt when it hits you in the eye. FML

#17468167
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30183) - you deserved it (8725)

On 08/14/2011 at 7:20am - misc - by Goaway (man) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I walked outside my house to find my father in nothing but his underwear, spraying ants with ant-killer, laughing like a maniac and screaming, "Die bitches! Die!" FML

#17447180
237 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31291) - you deserved it (4228)

On 08/12/2011 at 2:17am - misc - by TuteSweet - United States (Connecticut)

Today, our power went out due to some severe storms. My daughter, who is 18, asked me why the lights on the car still worked. FML

#17333376
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34766) - you deserved it (8894)

On 08/01/2011 at 4:18pm - misc - by OhDeary (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I was walking on the beach when I tripped. I was about to land on a kid's sandcastle, so I tried to dodge by leaning left to avoid it. Before I hit the ground, I noticed the many rocks I was heading for. FML

#17197831
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26271) - you deserved it (3750)

On 07/21/2011 at 12:18am - misc - by MICHAELTHEA (man) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I got a text message from my ex from about a year ago, asking if my 4-day-old son was his. I don't know what's sadder - the fact that he thinks a gestation period can last 11 months, or that he's more willing to step up to the plate than the baby's actual father. FML

#17061004
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27192) - you deserved it (7990)

On 07/11/2011 at 12:48am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I went to the park with a girl I like. She got playful and climbed a tree, insisting I come up, too. While we were sitting and enjoying the view, she suddenly knocked me off the branch, sending me crashing to the ground. FML

#17044737
229 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32433) - you deserved it (5495)

On 07/09/2011 at 8:13pm - love - by wolf boy - United States (Connecticut)

Today, my ex-boyfriend posted on my boyfriend's facebook wall. Apparently I give awful blowjobs. FML

#16996053
191 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36703) - you deserved it (10332)

On 07/06/2011 at 2:15am - intimacy - by Anna - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I worked up the courage to confess my feelings to this girl I'm crazy about. I even wrote and recorded a song for her. Instead of listening to it, she gave it to her ex boyfriend who responded to my heartfelt words by headbutting me. FML

#16386791
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28821) - you deserved it (6435)

On 05/28/2011 at 12:44pm - love - by StratMan (man) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I was on a three hour flight to Los Angeles for a corporate meeting. The woman next to me instantly fell asleep and snored louder than a freight train, while the kid behind me made a hobby of thashing my seat from behind. When I peered over and asked him to stop, he spat in my face. FML

#15887024
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31868) - you deserved it (3065)

On 04/22/2011 at 2:43pm - work - by Ashleigh - United States (Connecticut)

Today, a woman called my work and accused me of having an affair with her husband, my coworker, demanding that my boss discipline me. I don't know her, I barely know her husband, and I haven't had sex in months. FML

#15680012
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32829) - you deserved it (2745)

On 04/07/2011 at 1:30pm - intimacy - by kharrington - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I was dumped by my boyfriend. We're currently sharing a room on a cruise ship. FML

#15589378
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38250) - you deserved it (5204)

On 04/01/2011 at 1:35pm - love - by gRRRrr (woman) - United States (Connecticut)



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