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FMLs submitted from Colorado

Today, I was petting my cat and I jokingly said out loud, "Oh, the pussy likes it rough? You like that, don't you?" My windows were open and I could hear the neighbors laughing. FML

Today, while watching TV with my wife, I realized that we were still watching "My Little Pony" even though the kids had been asleep for half an hour. FML

#19495403
230 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20891) - you deserved it (5121)

On 04/19/2012 at 12:08pm - misc - by ajnmegs - United States (Colorado)

Today, while running in the park, I noticed some ducks in a pond. I stopped to look at them and began quacking at them, to see if they would react. This would have been OK had I not been wearing ear-buds, blasting music, making me unable to realize just how loud I was quacking. With people all around. FML

#19449312
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7577) - you deserved it (31883)

On 04/11/2012 at 11:39am - animals - by Quackers (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, my mom tagged me in a picture on Facebook. It's a very zoomed in picture of a zit that had just recently erupted on my face. The caption is "My baby's biggest zit yet!" FML

#19427377
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29201) - you deserved it (2289)

On 04/08/2012 at 1:13am - misc - by Brianna Weltmire - United States (Colorado)

Today, I got my yearbook. My sister and I are identical twins, and we realized only my sister had a picture in it. When we asked the head of yearbook, they said they thought it was the same girl trying to get two pictures, so they put in the prettier one. FML

#19269452
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37253) - you deserved it (2038)

On 03/13/2012 at 2:12am - misc - by Rynne S. - United States (Colorado)

Today, a guy came by my house and demanded my fiancé come out and fight. He explained that my fiancé had been stupid enough to not only troll on a local interest forum, but to leave his name and our address, inviting people to "come shut me up if you think you're tough enough." FML

#19260782
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24458) - you deserved it (3027)

On 03/11/2012 at 10:49pm - misc - by me (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I went to a dance with the boy I like. To my delight, he tried to pick me up. To my dismay, he couldn't. FML

#19157745
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25069) - you deserved it (6179)

On 02/25/2012 at 12:04am - love - by michellemoyah (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I received more affection from my wife in a video game than I ever have in real life. FML

#19128091
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21293) - you deserved it (3844)

On 02/21/2012 at 12:01am - love - by bloodshedblack - United States (Colorado)

Today, my dad made a new house rule: "If it's yellow let it mellow, if it's brown flush it down." My whole house now smells like pee. FML

#19082292
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25123) - you deserved it (2327)

On 02/15/2012 at 12:05am - misc - by Bondi414 (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I forgot to grab toilet paper on the way home from work. Since I don't have a car and all of my friends have plans for Valentine's Day I'm now down to wiping with cotton balls. FML

#19079186
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17872) - you deserved it (7425)

On 02/14/2012 at 8:26pm - health - by no tp (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I took my first shower in weeks after having had spinal surgery. My sister flushed a toilet. I couldn't reach the nozzle or my cane to get off the shower bench, and all I could do was sit there as scalding hot water sprayed all over me. FML

#19033928
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36650) - you deserved it (1890)

On 02/09/2012 at 12:28pm - health - by Ouchies - United States (Colorado)

Today, I woke up and decided that I no longer give a fuck what I look like. Today is also the day a very attractive exchange student joined my private band lessons. FML

#18943419
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19612) - you deserved it (11136)

On 01/29/2012 at 2:15pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Colorado)

Today, my boyfriend gave me twelve roses and told me that he would love me until the last one dies. Remembering the Facebook like, I began looking for the fake one but couldn't find it. When I pointed out that all twelve were real and would die within days, he responded, "Exactly." FML

#18936421
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33454) - you deserved it (3030)

On 01/28/2012 at 7:10pm - love - by Shelly P. (woman) - United States (Colorado)



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