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FMLs submitted from Colorado

Today, I was in my hot tub with my brand new phone. I set it down and when I grabbed my towel I knocked it into the water. I quickly snatched it up and dried it off with the towel and suprisingly only one button stopped working. It was the unlock button, a perfectly good phone that I can't use. FML

#6337523
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7134) - you deserved it (42515)

On 11/17/2009 at 1:48am - misc - by JakeHolmes (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I had a surprise birthday party thrown in my honor. All of my friends and family had been invited, and all of the details were perfect. Who threw the party for me? My ex-girlfriend who I dumped last week for "not being thoughtful enough." FML

#6333617
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6931) - you deserved it (50628)

On 11/16/2009 at 9:40pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, at 2 in the morning, a noisy work crew started up in the parking lot next to my apartment. What were they doing at that ungodly hour? Installing a light that now shines right into my window. FML

#6313521
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27161) - you deserved it (1660)

On 11/15/2009 at 2:45pm - misc - by theropod (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I was walking to the parking lot from class while texting. When I looked up as I approached my parking spot, I noticed the words "F*ck you Dave" keyed into my car. Hi, my name is Clare. Who's Dave? FML

#6283457
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32363) - you deserved it (1785)

On 11/13/2009 at 1:35am - misc - by mynameis (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I got to work in the ER at the local hospital. A lady came in with high blood sugar. She was concerned because the same thing happened to her husband. I reassured her, telling her she'll be back with her husband in an hour or so. Her husband died four years ago from something similar. FML

#6172287
34 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25462) - you deserved it (6770)

On 11/05/2009 at 7:40pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I had lunch with some important potential clients at a fancy restaurant. I really wanted to make a good impression. When the piano music stopped, I started clapping while looking around for the pianist. Apparently, it was a CD. FML

#5953871
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9738) - you deserved it (35456)

On 10/23/2009 at 1:01am - work - by E.S. (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I started my first day at work, I've been unemployed for a while and am in college, so naturally I have no money. At the end of my shift, I ask what we do with the extra bread, and they tell me to throw it away. Being poor and hungry, I decide to take the bread home. I got fired for stealing. FML

#5892629
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43342) - you deserved it (8892)

On 10/19/2009 at 4:46am - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I was playing FarmTown and got into a fight with a 14 year old boy. I threatened him with physical violence, and he reported me. I'm 23 years old and got banned from a virtual farming game for threatening children. FML

#5841852
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7120) - you deserved it (55688)

On 10/15/2009 at 1:04pm - kids - by hatelittleboys (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, my oldest son answered my phone call much to my surprise as we haven't spoken in a year. The first words out of his mouth were, "I didn't mean to pick up the phone." He then hung up. FML

#5764278
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32867) - you deserved it (8067)

On 10/10/2009 at 8:30pm - kids - by Jer (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, we were doing stretches in dance class where you are on your hands and doing the splits in the air while your partner helps hold you and stretch your legs further. Right as I lift my left leg up, I farted hugely right in my partner's face. I couldn't make eye contact for the rest of class. FML

#5716405
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31767) - you deserved it (7712)

On 10/08/2009 at 1:05am - misc - by belle_arina (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I moved out of my parents basement. After I hugged my parents I walked out the door only to remember I left my phone in the kitchen. I open the door and see my parents dancing. FML

#5644801
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32574) - you deserved it (12541)

On 10/04/2009 at 4:31pm - misc - by neverStopLaughin - United States (Colorado)

Today, I found an old friend of mine on Facebook. After adding her, I suggested friends for her. She ended up adding every single one I added, but not me. I later saw her ask one of those friends who the hell I was and how I knew all of them. We used to eat lunch together everyday. FML

#5519690
39 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34252) - you deserved it (2596)

On 09/28/2009 at 12:09am - misc - by alliobamy (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I had lunch with friends I hadn't seen in years. We took a few group shots with my camera, and I went home and downloaded them to my computer. Seeing them on my monitor, I noticed a yellow spot on my black shirt, so I looked down. A big, dried booger was stuck there. FML

#5498467
39 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26023) - you deserved it (9613)

On 09/27/2009 at 1:00am - misc - by PigPen (man) - United States (Colorado)



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