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FMLs submitted from Colorado

Today, I took my mom to Victoria's Secret to help her find a bra. She made me try one on to see if it looked good on me. Turns out we have the same cup size. I'm a guy. FML

#17080127
271 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19970) - you deserved it (47665)

On 07/12/2011 at 12:45pm - misc - by sm702 - United States (Colorado)

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me using the "it's not you, it's me" speech with a slight variation, saying instead, "It's not me, it's you. And yes, I meant to say it that way round." FML

#17076544
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27934) - you deserved it (5486)

On 07/12/2011 at 3:14am - love - by Jackie Campbell - United States (Colorado)

Today, my dad gave me a speech about being gay. He said he'll accept me if that's who I truly am, but he wants me to think it over first. I'm an actor in a play. I had to explain the concept of wearing costumes and acting like someone else to him. For the third time. FML

#16921062
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32240) - you deserved it (3748)

On 06/30/2011 at 10:36am - misc - by sealpop09 - United States (Colorado)

Today, my boyfriend of five years proposed to me in front of my entire family. He later confessed that it was part of a dare with his friends because, "There was no way you'd say yes." Guess who has to explain this to all my relatives? FML

#16882542
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39393) - you deserved it (3181)

On 06/27/2011 at 2:38pm - love - by mavstrr1764847 - United States (Colorado)

Today, I was on a flight home. I wasn't going to arrive until midnight, so I was offered an earlier flight that got back at ten. I got to baggage claims and it turned out they lost my bag. I sat there for 2 hours. The people on my original flight left for home before I did. FML

#16733710
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27381) - you deserved it (3344)

On 06/18/2011 at 7:54pm - misc - by me - United States (Colorado)

Today, I realized that I text my boyfriend more than I see him. He's my next door neighbor. FML

#16717900
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14696) - you deserved it (33963)

On 06/17/2011 at 8:31pm - love - by Emily J. - United States (Colorado)

Today, I went to sell my wedding rings, due to the fact that I'm getting divorced from a man who cheated on me. The jeweler informed me that the stone in my engagement ring is fake. I won't even be able to cover the divorce costs from the proceeds. FML

#16702433
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35811) - you deserved it (4937)

On 06/16/2011 at 10:17pm - money - by pookie99 - United States (Colorado)

Today, after a long night of drinking and partying, I woke up in my bed next to a beast of a woman. At least I know I made it home safely. FML

#16696125
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10694) - you deserved it (42096)

On 06/16/2011 at 2:34pm - intimacy - by Madmanmorton (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I ran out of breath while mowing the lawn. I was on a riding lawn mower. FML

#16650975
191 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9650) - you deserved it (48978)

On 06/13/2011 at 9:08pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (Colorado)

Today, I got flustered because my hair straightener wasn't working. It took me fifteen minutes to realize I hadn't turned it on. FML

#16484312
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7781) - you deserved it (43010)

On 06/03/2011 at 2:32pm - misc - by Faithy (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I was released from hospital after being in a car accident. I used the phone book to call people I know to get a ride home, as my wallet and cellphone were still in the wrecked car. I had called my mom to come get me, but her response was "I don't feel like it." I live with her. FML

#16464614
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33207) - you deserved it (2573)

On 06/02/2011 at 5:27am - misc - by thanksmom (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I was really psyched to go see Kung Fu Panda 2 at the movies. Excited, I tried to do a flying kick off the cafeteria wall at work. Instead of kicking off, my leg crashed through the plasterboard and got stuck. My co-workers had to pull me free. FML

#16377844
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8290) - you deserved it (47634)

On 05/27/2011 at 8:56pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Colorado)

Today, my sister and I were eating at Wendy's. On the way out, I thought it would be funny to kick the door open and yell, "This is Sparta!" I lost my balance and fell flat on my butt. FML

#16359968
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7645) - you deserved it (59672)

On 05/26/2011 at 5:31pm - misc - by taydean - United States (Colorado)



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