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FMLs submitted from California

Today, while studying for an exam, the neighbor's chihuahua started barking outside. After a few seconds, my mom yelled out for me to stop laughing. She honestly thought the barking was my laughter. FML

#21396226
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30297) - you deserved it (3198)

On 04/19/2015 at 1:09pm - animals - by woof? (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was so sleep-deprived, I thought a white car driving toward me was a polar bear. I screamed like a little girl and started panicking. I live in California. FML

#21396178
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27581) - you deserved it (7299)

On 04/19/2015 at 11:06am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I went to the dentist for the first time in years. His first comment upon inspecting my teeth: "Meth. Hell of a drug." FML

#21395729
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28827) - you deserved it (10681)

On 04/18/2015 at 12:45pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my roommate and I are so broke, we resorted to going to a Narcotics Anonymous meeting just for the refreshments. FML

#21395180
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28391) - you deserved it (3689)

On 04/17/2015 at 11:50am - money - by jamongrande - United States (California)

Today, I had to get a colonoscopy. Which wouldn't have been so bad if they had removed the camera from my rectum before waking me up. FML

#21395025
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28288) - you deserved it (1919)

On 04/17/2015 at 12:56am - health - by Camera - United States (California)

Today, I tripped while rushing to my classes. In a desperate attempt to regain my balance, I grabbed the nearest thing to me. A fire alarm. FML

#21394235
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29341) - you deserved it (3674)

On 04/15/2015 at 6:12pm - misc - by Drill Drilled - United States (California)

Today, my husband and I caught our 12-year-old son "experimenting" with a 5-foot tall stuffed Mickey Mouse. He even made sure to rip Mickey's pants off. FML

#21392745
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29502) - you deserved it (3068)

On 04/13/2015 at 1:35am - intimacy - by bigmouthedmommy - United States (California)

Today, my 16 year old daughter convinced her little sister that I am a robot. Now every time I try to talk to her she starts crying. FML

#21392253
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28487) - you deserved it (2273)

On 04/12/2015 at 6:33am - kids - by anon - United States (California)

Today, I went driving for the first time with my mom. When she wasn't screaming, she gave great advice like, "Stop at the red light" and "Don't crash into cars". I need to drive 50 hours with her. FML

#21390568
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27920) - you deserved it (2478)

On 04/09/2015 at 10:03am - misc - by fedupson - United States (California)

Today, at a mind-numbingly boring support session, everyone was talking about their hardships. One guy was talking about losing his leg in a car accident. I was half-asleep and asked without thinking, "Did you ever find it?" I almost shat my pants at the roomful of death glares that followed. FML

#21389976
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17612) - you deserved it (32953)

On 04/08/2015 at 12:08pm - misc - by S to the HIT (man) - United States (California)

Today, I started lactating. That would be fine if I had a kid. Or was pregnant. Or wasn't 16. FML

Today, I got disappointed when I realized that I had to share a bed with my husband because we had company over. FML

#21389862
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23853) - you deserved it (17532)

On 04/08/2015 at 6:52am - love - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, after over six weeks of not getting a single shift at my part time job, I finally went in to meet my new manager. He didn't even know I existed. Apparently my old manager lied and said I quit so they hired someone else. FML



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