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FMLs submitted from California

Today, as I was driving with my boyfriend, he pointed out what a crappy car I drive. About how the locks don't work, the vents are broken, the windshield wipers are busted, my headlights aren't bright, and a hubcap is missing. Then he said I’m a good match for my car, 'cos we have the same “personality". FML

#5969153
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27041) - you deserved it (3252)

On 10/24/2009 at 1:07am - love - by Clunker (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I went to the post office and as I entered the building my car alarm went off. Thinking I'd accidentally pressed the alarm on my keys, I shut it off without looking. When I returned to my car, the passenger window was demolished and my purse with all my money was gone. FML

#5968362
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7202) - you deserved it (29539)

On 10/24/2009 at 12:19am - misc - by kiran - United States (California)

Today, I was driving on the freeway. I shut my windows and sunroof when I started to feel heavy rain hitting me in the face and shoulder. I was confused by the rain because the sun was bright and there was blue, cloudless sky. Then I saw the large trash truck in front of me spewing "trash juice". FML

#5959994
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31710) - you deserved it (2672)

On 10/23/2009 at 3:19pm - misc - by iross (man) - United States (California)

Today, I had to complete a project for my course in Italian. We had to write a little paragraph about a friend. I had to make one up. FML

#5954994
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28281) - you deserved it (4576)

On 10/23/2009 at 2:51am - misc - by wahwah (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I took a smoke break at work and I noticed a huge zit on my face. I used the reflection from a window to take care of the problem and then realized that there was a staff meeting taking place on the other side. FML

#5947832
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8870) - you deserved it (33204)

On 10/22/2009 at 7:05pm - misc - by JC (man) - United States (California)

Today, this guy who likes me accused me of cutting myself. I asked him what he was talking about, and he said, "Don't lie, I saw those scars on your thighs when we went swimming." I have stretch marks on my inner thighs, and now I have to explain them to him so he doesn't think I cut myself. FML

#5940932
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30669) - you deserved it (2638)

On 10/22/2009 at 3:41am - misc - by tessykins - United States (California)

Today, my cat managed to lock my dad and me outside of our house. FML

#5937584
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26921) - you deserved it (5906)

On 10/21/2009 at 10:58pm - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I went to my academic counselor to help me deal with my stress and anxiety, which has been making me nauseous from the constant strain. She suggested exercise to help these feelings. Every time I do so, I vomit. From the anxiety and stress. FML

#5932326
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21354) - you deserved it (4640)

On 10/21/2009 at 6:35pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was watching a movie with my sister, my roommate, and my girlfriend. Half way through the movie, my girlfriend left the room and texted me that she was breaking up with me. She then came back in the room, sat on my bed, and enjoyed the rest of the movie with us. FML

#5924772
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37395) - you deserved it (2636)

On 10/21/2009 at 2:39am - love - by Small_Fry_Hero (man) - United States (California)

Today, my roommate revealed that the reason he's so grumpy is because he hasn't gotten laid in a year. I'm his only female friend, and the entire time he talked to me, he stared at my chest. FML

#5923040
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18039) - you deserved it (3081)

On 10/20/2009 at 11:42pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend gave me a fancy chocolate candy and I got angry at him for forgetting that I'm allergic to chocolate and threw the candy into the garbage disposal. Turns out, he had spent a ton of money getting a chocolatier to put an engagement ring inside the candy that I just destroyed. FML

#5914745
234 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11460) - you deserved it (71367)

On 10/20/2009 at 4:17pm - misc - by jaxattax (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was driving down the road when a dog suddenly runs across the street. In attempt to spare its life, I swerved to the side of the road and rear-ended another car. The car I hit belonged the family that owned the dog. Now I have to pay them because I saved their dog's life. FML

#5891764
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32110) - you deserved it (4968)

On 10/19/2009 at 2:40am - animals - by JC - United States (California)

Today, I was sleeping next to my girlfriend and I turned over to the sound of her talking in her sleep. Because it was so cute, I was happy and I smiled, until she began to talk about "Troy" and "all the nasty things you can do to me." FML

#5876173
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17615) - you deserved it (1853)

On 10/18/2009 at 8:09am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)



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