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Submit your FML story

  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
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FMLs submitted from Buckinghamshire

Today, I ran into an attractive friend of a friend who I hadn't seen since a night out last month. I tried my best to be friendly and interesting, but he still seemed awkward. Later I find out that last time he saw me, I was blind drunk and vomiting after propositioning him all evening. FML

#18633167 (133)

I agree, your life sucks (6512) - you deserved it (17495)

On 12/28/2011 at 10:03am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Buckinghamshire)

Today, I called in sick at work because I have the flu. This is my first sick day in the 2 years I've worked there. It's also the day the CEO made a surprise visit. My co-workers all got generous salary increases, and some of them promotions. I'm not included, simply because I wasn't there. FML

#18501574 (125)

I agree, your life sucks (30255) - you deserved it (2221)

On 12/13/2011 at 7:15am - work - by rara1989 (woman) - United Kingdom (Buckinghamshire)

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, it was sunny and bright so I woke up feeling great. I pulled back the curtains in my room and saw my cat dead on the lawn. FML

#15676274 (212)

I agree, your life sucks (34890) - you deserved it (2654)

On 04/07/2011 at 3:11am - animals - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Buckinghamshire)

Today, I wrote a 2000 word essay on "Las Vegas - The City That Never Sleeps". I was proud of my work, until someone pointed out that New York is "The City That Never Sleeps", not Vegas. FML

#14793954 (163)

I agree, your life sucks (6973) - you deserved it (25938)

On 02/01/2011 at 5:35am - work - by mmaisie (woman) - United Kingdom (Buckinghamshire)

Today, I realised it takes me longer to take a dump than it does to have sex with my boyfriend. I also realised taking a dump is more satisfying. FML

#14442840 (96)

I agree, your life sucks (26432) - you deserved it (4205)

On 01/02/2011 at 8:22pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Buckinghamshire)

Today, I got fined when my fat dog decided to walk across a private film set to get at the catering area. FML

#13433237 (109)

I agree, your life sucks (13394) - you deserved it (6616)

On 10/13/2010 at 11:28am - money - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Buckinghamshire)

Today, I start work in an office, with my mother. FML

#12280624 (167)

I agree, your life sucks (18723) - you deserved it (8379)

On 08/03/2010 at 2:17am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Buckinghamshire)

Today, I got a missed call from a job that I really really want. I completely forgot that my answer machine message was a ridiculous and rude poem that I recorded previously when I was drunk. Somehow I don't think I'll be getting a call back. FML

#7433916 (54)

I agree, your life sucks (3055) - you deserved it (22677)

On 01/19/2010 at 6:51am - work - by Stilljobless (woman) - United Kingdom (Buckinghamshire)

Today, I found out that I have to work Christmas Day. There's no public transport running and taxis are triple fare. It'll cost me more getting to work than I'll actually earn during the shift. FML

#6917997 (87)

I agree, your life sucks (19044) - you deserved it (1254)

On 12/24/2009 at 6:20am - work - by Barstaff (man) - United Kingdom (Buckinghamshire)

Today, after having a shower, I walked back into my room butt naked. As I looked up I saw the window cleaner staring right at me. I looked. He looked. And without thinking I dropped straight to the floor to hid myself, then realized my naked butt was still staring right at him. FML

#6694973 (50)

I agree, your life sucks (9190) - you deserved it (3833)

On 12/10/2009 at 2:51pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Buckinghamshire)

Today, I discovered that my boyfriend only stayed with me because he didn't want to "be alone," and now that he has a new girlfriend, apparently he won't be. We were together for three and a half years. FML

#6225204 (65)

I agree, your life sucks (22010) - you deserved it (1910)

On 11/09/2009 at 5:24am - love - by LasagnaRawks (woman) - United Kingdom (Buckinghamshire)

Today, I arranged the food on my plate in a smiley face to try and make myself feel better. I'm a 38 year old man. It worked. FML

#6186259 (55)

I agree, your life sucks (22027) - you deserved it (3843)

On 11/06/2009 at 7:32pm - misc - by Anon (man) - United Kingdom (Buckinghamshire)

Today, I was hanging out with a guy I liked. We sat in the gardens, me facing the path, him with his back to it. We were in deep conversation when I noticed a dog that looked exactly like mine. Then I looked up and saw a man that looked like my dad. Yes - my parents followed me on a date. FML

#5254705 (87)

I agree, your life sucks (39633) - you deserved it (2218)

On 09/14/2009 at 5:30pm - love - by bumblebee (woman) - United Kingdom (Buckinghamshire)