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FMLs submitted from British Columbia

Today, I went to my girlfriend's house. She had promised me we'd get it on so I couldn't wait. When I got there, I didn't get it on. Instead, I got a list of reasons why I make her depressed. FML

#9387980
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15023) - you deserved it (20782)

On 03/25/2010 at 9:50pm - intimacy - by bad boyfriend - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I got into a fight with the dryer over a plastic toy car. My hand is bleeding and numb, three of my nails are broken and I have a bruise on my chin. The plastic car is still stuck in the now broken dryer. FML

#9150166
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10938) - you deserved it (22013)

On 03/17/2010 at 12:41am - misc - by Loser (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I followed an acne treatment. It was only after I'd finished the treatment that I read the bottom line, stating "Do not scrub your face". I only had one pimple to start with, now it looks like I sandpapered my face. FML

#9057957
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6733) - you deserved it (25888)

On 03/13/2010 at 9:30pm - health - by Painfulfaceforme - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, while in bed, my nose became runny. Being as tired as I was, I decided to ignore it until the morning. Turns out it was a nose bleed, and my pillowcase is ruined. FML

Today, I found out my sister has a new boyfriend. That would have been helpful to know 3 hours ago before I told her boyfriend, who is also my best friend, that I loved him. His response? "HAHAHA! Good one! Oh Seriously? Shit." FML

#8765418
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29887) - you deserved it (2878)

On 03/02/2010 at 1:07am - love - by SingleSara. (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I watched Cast Away with my girlfriend after not seeing it for a year. I forgot how sad it was when Wilson "dies" at the end. I cried. My girlfriend told me to man up. FML

#8756246
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9878) - you deserved it (21847)

On 03/01/2010 at 8:17pm - misc - by whywilson.. (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I locked my keys in my car. I was late for work so I went to smash the side window with a big rock. The rock bounced off the window and into my face. FML

#8706906
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9009) - you deserved it (28335)

On 02/28/2010 at 12:36am - work - by chevysprint (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I arrived at work to find an email from the manager whom I had bought concert tickets from the night before. He said he had actually sold those tickets to someone else. He still expects to be paid. FML

#8692922
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22190) - you deserved it (1975)

On 02/27/2010 at 3:45pm - work - by mcfaily - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I was having sex with a girl. While we were fooling around, she started squeezing my cheeks and told me I remind her of her son. FML

#8434762
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19635) - you deserved it (2969)

On 02/19/2010 at 2:41am - intimacy - by Brett meek - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my husband and I were role playing to keep our marriage alive. His character was a deranged stalker while I was the helpless girl. My neighbor thought I was really being chased so she called the cops. Once they came we explained the whole story and got a fine for disturbing the peace. FML

#8193148
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17961) - you deserved it (6580)

On 02/13/2010 at 1:51am - intimacy - by whathef???? - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I was robbed at work. The guy stole my cell phone, bag, and laptop. Because of the robbery, I had to close the store two and a half hours early. My boss decided to dock my hours. FML

#8158175
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24102) - you deserved it (2043)

On 02/12/2010 at 2:44am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I fell down the stairs, and my uncle came rushing over because he thought it was his 1 year old son. He saw me lying on the ground and said, "Oh. It's you," and then left to watch the hockey game. FML

#8067706
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23441) - you deserved it (2537)

On 02/09/2010 at 9:52pm - misc - by spanishgirl101 (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I found out that, if timed just right, the alarm function on my phone can be disabled by a text message. And my dad has an impeccable sense of timing. I was 20 minutes late for work. FML

#7974349
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23292) - you deserved it (2821)

On 02/07/2010 at 1:58pm - work - by Ishii (man) - Canada (British Columbia)



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