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FMLs submitted from British Columbia

Today, my Dad and I went to McDonald's, only to have him shove two handfuls of sugar packets into the bag. He said, "If it's for free, why only take one?" To make it worse, my crush was at the till, watching what was happening. FML

#17497272
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23282) - you deserved it (3279)

On 08/17/2011 at 3:14am - money - by AshamedDaughter - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I woke up exhausted because a croaking frog had kept me awake the night before. This has happened every night for the past week, and no matter how far away I take the frog, it always ends up sitting in the same place the next morning. FML

#17490517
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24740) - you deserved it (5151)

On 08/16/2011 at 2:18pm - misc - by froggylicious - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I was lying in bed with my boyfriend, telling him how much I loved him. His answer? "Less lovin' more humpin'." This happens every single time. FML

#17447150
180 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23359) - you deserved it (27072)

On 08/12/2011 at 2:14am - intimacy - by fml - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my wife didn't say a word to me because her horoscope told her not to. FML

#17418285
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33941) - you deserved it (4012)

On 08/09/2011 at 1:29pm - love - by MrOh - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, while cleaning the bathroom in a suite at the hotel I work at, I heard a couple come in, and then a marriage proposal. She said no, that she had been seeing someone else and left the room. I was then alone in the bathroom, listening to a grown man sob. FML

#17415513
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39208) - you deserved it (3764)

On 08/09/2011 at 3:35am - work - by smurfpoo (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I was at a pool party with some friends. They grabbed and lifted me in the air, about to throw me in the pool. My iPhone was in my pocket, so I screamed "MY PHONE!" They paused so I could gently throw it onto a deck chair. It bounced, hit the concrete, and cracked its screen. FML

#17332249
196 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29126) - you deserved it (11695)

On 08/01/2011 at 2:12pm - misc - by howniceofyou (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, as I was taking the bus home, I sat down next to a man wearing an FML shirt. While snickering I said to him "You totally deserved it." I guess he thought that comment deserved a broken nose. FML

#17306841
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18141) - you deserved it (74219)

On 07/30/2011 at 5:26am - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, some ballbag broke into my house just to take my broom. FML

#17278350
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26521) - you deserved it (2672)

On 07/27/2011 at 9:50am - misc - by kelsjenks - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I went skinny dipping with my friends. A security man drove up the dock we were on with his bike. After informing us that the dock was closed, and noticing all of our swimsuits on the dock, he refused to move his flashlight beam from us in the water. FML

#17237842
187 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14238) - you deserved it (34625)

On 07/24/2011 at 2:41am - misc - by Men '86 - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I was laying in bed making out with a girl. After trying to figure out for a while why she was spending so much time on my neck it finally hit me. She was frantically and secretly trying to remove the gum she got stuck in my hair. She failed. FML

#17170835
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35642) - you deserved it (3899)

On 07/19/2011 at 12:04am - intimacy - by tLee - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, trying to make a good impression and be helpful, I volunteered to look after my manager's cat while she moves house. The cat hasn't stopped meowing since he got here this evening, it's now 4 am and I have work in the morning. FML

#17064042
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22511) - you deserved it (6142)

On 07/11/2011 at 6:53am - work - by leahneedssleep (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I asked my daughter what time it was. She stared at the clock for several seconds before muttering, "I don't know". She's 14 years old and on the honour roll, and yet she can't tell the time on an analogue clock. FML

#16939621
316 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26548) - you deserved it (11292)

On 07/01/2011 at 7:12pm - kids - by sadmother (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I had to lie to my female roommate about what happened last night. She was drunk and spent half the night cuddling with me and trying to get me to kiss her. I've loved this girl for two years, but I promised her I wouldn't let her cheat on her boyfriend with anyone. Even me. FML

#16677911
338 comments

I agree, your life sucks (65243) - you deserved it (11498)

On 06/15/2011 at 2:00pm - love - by anonymous (man) - Canada (British Columbia)



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